“Well, I don’t know If I’m ready to be the man I have to be. I’ll take a breath. I’ll take her by my side. We stand in awe. We’ve created life. With arms wide open under the sunlight. Welcome to this place. I’ll show you everything. With arms wide open. Now, everything has changed. I’ll show you love. I’ll show you everything.”-Creed (With Arms Wide Open)
November 2026
The waiting area was feeling overly crowded. MJ looked around at everyone. Grandma Vivian was resting next to her husband, Cliff. She had been worried and stressed. That wasn’t good for her health. She was already battling an aggressive cancer. Aunt Ashlyn’s eyes were swollen, red, and puffy from all the crying she had been doing. Across the room, Lola was asleep. Her head was resting on Blair.
Blair looked like he could fall apart at any moment. He had been trying to keep it together for Lola. You could tell he was worried. His hands were shaking despite resting at his side. Then there was Matthew. He looked to be almost sick. He was next to Ishmael, but a quick glance and you could see mentally he was a few million miles away.
MJ felt uneasy. In his mind, he played the last conversation he had with Noah when he moved out. He had been unkind and blamed Noah for something that really wasn’t his fault. He just didn’t know how to handle all his anger or where to place the blame. He leaned his head back against the wall and closed his eyes. He needed to find a safe place in his mind; otherwise, he was going to crack under the stress and worry.
April 2009
Luka and Noah were standing in the middle of the apartment where Luka was looking to sign the lease. The apartment wasn’t the best that Atlanta offered, but it was all she could afford at the moment. Noah was looking around at the place with his nose turned up. He was deeply disappointed with it.
“Okay, Noah, just say what you have to say because you standing there with that stank face isn’t helping,” she said. Luka was irritated. Noah hadn’t liked a single apartment she showed him.
Noah sighed, “I don’t like it. You and the baby deserve better.”
Luka rolled her eyes and asked, “Why? Because it’s his baby?”
“That’s not a fair question. You know how I feel about him, Luka,” Noah said as he continued to look around the apartment.
“I know how you feel, and you also know I wasn’t born with a silver spoon in my mouth. This is what I can afford for me and my baby,” she said.
Noah pleaded, “Let me help. I can pay the rent for a nice apartment for you and that little one growing inside of you.”
“I don’t want your money. I’m not a charity case, you bastard,” she shouted.
“Not once in the last four months have I treated you like a charity case. I’ve been here to help, and honestly, I’m tired of you treating me like shit for wanting to help. I’m not Matthew, and I can’t help that he hurt you, and I can’t give him up either,” Noah yelled.
“I know you’re not him. That’s what pisses me off. You’re doing what he should be doing. This isn’t your responsibility,” she said as she fought to hold back her tears.
“It kinda is. I’m with him for the rest of my life, and that means I’ll be a part of the baby's life. I’ll be there to help. This is me helping. I have money. I’m a trust fund baby,” Noah said with a smile.
Luka smirked, “I never met a black trust fund baby. I don’t want my child to be materialistic.”
“We’re a very small number,” he said. “You do know Matthew is half back, right? He is a trust fund baby as well.”
“I know,” she replied almost dreadfully.
“Your baby is going to be a trust fund baby as well. Let him grow up in a nice place. You can still teach him all the other things about hard work and a crappy economy,” Noah said, smiling.
“Fine,” she said, frustrated.
“This would go by so much faster and smoother if you would just let me have my way,” he said jokingly.
Luka smiled, and just as she was about to say something, a sharp pain suddenly hit her. She doubled over and grabbed her abdomen in pain. She let out a loud scream. Something wasn’t right, and it was scary for her.
“Are you okay,” Noah asked.
“Noah call for help. Something is wrong,” she cried. “I’m scared, Noah. Hurry!”
THREE HOURS LATER….
Luka went into early labor. The doctors tried to stop her labor, but MJ was determined to see the world. So, despite the doctor’s best efforts, baby MJ went into distress, and they were forced to do a c-section on Luka. The baby was delivered at 23 weeks.
The doctors were not sure he would survive the night. Luka found herself falling into a deep depression. Noah went to the NICU to see the baby. There were so many little babies there with their loved ones. In the back of the room is where he found and first laid eyes on MJ. Even with all the tubes in him, Noah could see that he was going to grow up and be a beautiful, strong young man.
“Hey, you. I’m Noah. I’m going to be your best friend and guiding light in this world. Just call me your fairy godmother. Lord knows you’re going to need it. Your mom and dad are going to be a good nightmare, but I’m going to make sure you always get your way. I just need you to be strong and make it through the night. I’m gonna stay with you all night, and we are going to show that doctor just how tough you are. I really want you in this world.” Noah took a seat in the chair next to the infant incubator.
That night, Noah stayed by MJ’s side, and eventually, he fell asleep. When he woke up, Luka was in a wheelchair next to him. She looked to be feeling better. Her face was peaceful.
“You’re out of bed,” he said as he yawned.
“The nurse told me you talked to the baby all night, and his stats started to improve. He’s got a long road, but there’s a fight in him. You talked my baby into fighting, and I can never thank you enough for that. So, I signed the birth certificate this morning. He has a name. I named him Montgomery Josiah Spencer,” she said with tears in her eyes and a smile. “After the two most important men in my life. My father, Josiah, and the one person I never could have done this without, Noah Montgomery.”
Noah looked at the baby, “You hear that you have a name. We share a name, and I’m going to call you MJ for the rest of your life,” Noah looked at Luka and said, “Thank you.”
At the sound of Noah’s voice, one of MJ’s little fingers moved. Luka gasped, and she grabbed hold of Noah. They knew in their heart of hearts that he was going to be fine.
April 2014
Noah and Luka were standing in the hall of the house. Noah was upset and Luka was trying her hardest to explain things to Noah.
“Why would you do that, Luka? Like it makes no sense at all,” Noah said.
“Oh please, Noah. It makes perfect sense. You call MJ every night to read him a bedtime story. You’re here for his fifth birthday party like you’ve been for the other four birthdays. You play ball with him, spend time with him, and he loves you. Quite naturally, he’s going to think that you’re his father.”
“And what happens when Matthew is ready,” Noah asked. “How do we correct this lie then?”
“It’s been five years. He’s never going to be ready. It’s time you accept that. I’ve already done that. He came home crying because the other kid's dads were at the school, and he thought he didn’t have one. I wasn’t going to let my son hurt. If you don’t want to play the role, stop doing things a father does. He needs you, Noah. Do not hurt my son.”
“Daddy,” a young MJ shouted with glee.
Luka and Noah turned and MJ was standing at the end of the hall with Luka’s mom. MJ started running towards Noah. The second MJ called him dad; everything else went away. It felt right. He had been there since his birth, and he wasn’t ever going away.
“Look at you,” Noah said as he picked him up and spun him around. “You’re getting so big.”
“He lights up when he sees you, Noah,” Luka said. She needed to drive her point home.
Noah looked at her and said, “Of course he does; I’m his father.”
March 2016
It had been two months since Matthew died, and Noah was just going through the motions. He was depressed and spent his days begging God to end his suffering. There was a knock at the door. He dragged himself to open the door and there was Luka standing there with MJ.
“You look like how I feel,” Luka said as she walked past Noah.
“Hey, Dad,” MJ said as he entered behind her.
MJ went and put on some video games in the other room. Luka sat Noah down, and she had the conversation with him that he hadn’t expected to have.
“There’s nothing they can do for me. I’m going to die, and I don’t want my son to be without a parent.”
“But he will be. Both his parents will be gone,” Noah said as tears rolled down his face. “This isn’t fair.”
“No crying. I’ve had time to make my peace with this. My parents are of old age. Noah, you are the only father he’s ever known. You have to raise him. I’m begging you. Don’t let him go through this alone. You know what it’s like to lose a parent. You got seventeen years with your dad. He’s only getting eight years at best with me. Please.”
“Luka, I’m still grieving. I just buried my husband two months ago. This is too much for me,” he said.
“Daddy, you don’t want me,” MJ asked from behind.
Noah turned around, and for the first time, he saw Matthew in the boy. It made his heart skip a beat or two. How could he turn his back on such innocence?
“Why would you think that? You’re my favorite son,” Noah said.
“I’m your only son,” MJ said as he ran over.
“Well, you may have a little brother or sister coming soon,” Luka said.
“I want a brother,” MJ shouted and jumped into Noah’s lap.
Noah and MJ began to playfully wrestle as Luka watched them in absolute delight. The only time she felt peace was when she saw how happy MJ was.
June 2017
MJ was dressed in his black suit in the cemetery. He picked up a handful of dirt and dropped it on Luka’s coffin. Noah was holding five-month-old Lola, and Vivian was standing next to him. Noah was now a single parent to two kids.
A few weeks later, Noah was strolling down the streets of NYC with his kids when he passed by a brownstone with a for-sale sign in the yard. MJ stopped and looked at the house.
“Oh, Dad, this is where Rudy lives,” MJ shouted. “I wanna live in Rudy’s house.”
Noah started to laugh. MJ had discovered clips of The Cosby Show online. The brownstone was massive. It felt like the perfect change that they needed for their growing family.
They entered the brownstone. The realtor was showing the place to a nice couple. They stopped in their tracks. Noah felt like he had come in on something he wasn’t supposed to see.
“I’m sorry, sir. It’s a private showing. You have to make an appointment,” the realtor said.
“Actually, I think we’re going to make an offer,” the woman said.
“I’m sorry. Congratulations on your new home,” Noah said.
“Dad, this place is awesome. I wanna live here,” MJ said in awe of the home.
That was the first time Noah felt that pull of a parent’s heart. The one where you’d do anything for your child. His son had been through enough, and if the brownstone was what he wanted, then it was what he was going to get.
“You sure, son,” Noah asked.
“Yeah. This is awesome. It’s so big,” MJ said.
“Okay. On second thought, my son loves it. So, call your client and tell them not only am I paying full asking price, but to make sure this goes my way, I’m willing to pay a few million dollars over asking. Full cash, and we move in tomorrow.”
The couple and the realtor were left speechless. Noah wanted what he wanted, and nothing was going to stop him from giving his children the best that money could buy.
“I don’t have all day. Make the bloody call. MJ, go pick out your room,” Noah told him.
MJ jumped for joy and ran to find the room he wanted. Noah looked around the home. He was determined to fill it with happy memories for both of his kids even though nothing inside of him wanted to live anymore.
August 2017
Noah was in bed staring at a photo of Matthew. Tears were streaming down his face. This was how he spent most of his nights. He would cry himself to sleep while staring at the photo of Matthew. This particular night, his grief hit an all-time high. It felt like he couldn’t go on anymore.
Suicidal thoughts were no stranger to Noah. He had attempted to end his life back in high school. The same feelings of loneliness, depression, anxiety, and self-pity had him by the hands. He climbed out of bed and grabbed the bottle of anti-depressants. He stared at the bottle and wondered if it would do the trick. He wanted to go and be with Matthew.
“Daddy,” MJ said, sobbing.
MJ’s voice startled Noah. He dropped the pills. He found MJ standing in the doorway of the master bath in his pajamas. He had tears rolling down his face.
“Hey. Why aren’t you in bed,” he asked.
“I’m scared to sleep,” MJ said.
“Why?”
“I don’t want you to die like mommy. Please don’t go to heaven,” he said as he broke into sobs.
It was at that moment that Noah’s depression was lifted off him. He picked up MJ and hugged him. They lay in the bed next to one another.
“MJ, I’m not going anywhere for a very long time,” Noah informed him.
“You promise,” he asked.
Noah promised, “I promise. There’s so much I have to teach you and be here for. I can’t go even if I wanted to.”
“Do you want to go,” MJ asked. The boy was smart, and nothing was ever lost on him.
“No. I want to be here forever for you and your sister,” Noah said as he kissed his forehead. “I’ll be here with arms wide open to show you everything.”
“Arms wide open,” MJ repeated.
“Just like the song,” Noah said as he reached for his iphone 7 Plus. He found the song and hit play. “Arms Wide Open”- by Creed played as the two snuggled up together. Noah knew he had to fight and push forward to be there for the kids. They didn’t deserve what was happening to them. They didn’t ask for any of this, and therefore, he had to protect them and love them with everything in him.
October 2017
Noah was in the kitchen with his mother and Cliff chopping up vegetables. They were visiting for the week. Vivian loved spending time with her grandkids. They were the apple of her eyes. MJ came in and hugged everyone, as he was always prone to do.
“MJ, you know what you want to be for Halloween,” Cliff asked.
“Yeah. I want to be black,” he said innocently.
Vivian nearly choked on her wine. Noah almost sliced his finger off. Cliff was left speechless. Noah put the knife down. All the adults stared at one another in disbelief.
“Grandbaby, what’d you mean you want to be black? Why would you think you aren’t black,” Vivian asked.
“Derrick Jackson’s mom said I was a white boy whose daddy is a nig—”
Vivian interjected, “OKAY.”
Noah said, “Don’t listen to Derrick Jackson’s mom. She’s a cun—”
“NOAH,” Vivian yelled.
“I don’t look like my mommy and daddy. I’m not dark,” MJ said. It sounded like all his little hopes and dreams had been crushed.
Noah groaned. He picked MJ up and made him look at himself in the mirror.
“Black people come in all colors. We are as chocolate as candy, as bright as the sun, and sometimes we’re a sweet caramel. No matter the color we are black always and forever. We are proud of it. You are a little different, and that’s okay. You’re biracial or, as some people say, mixed. You see, you have three parents. Your mom was black. Your biological dad, Matthew, was biracial. His mom is white, and his dad was black. Then you have me, and I’m black. You inherited Matthew’s skin color, eyes, and hair texture.”
“So, I’m part white and part black? Lika zebra?”
“Yes. You can identify as whatever you want in this world. Be black, be white, be gay, be straight or whatever. I don’t care as long as you’re happy. You will grow up knowing all parts of your heritage, and when the time is right, you can declare yourself as what you feel comfortable. But no matter what, you are my son, and that will never change, no matter what color your skin looks like.”
“What’s gay,” he asked.
“Me. Now, no more questions for tonight,” Noah said.
“I love you daddy.”
“I love you too. Now, go wash up for dinner,” Noah said as he put him down.
MJ ran off to wash up. Noah turned to his mom and Cliff. The conversation had left him feeling upset. MJ was too young for some adult to be discussing his race and confusing him.
“Your father would have been so proud of you. I am so proud of you. You told him right,” Vivian said as he stood to go and hug her son.
Noah sighed, “Imma stab that bitch. He’s too young for that kind of conversation.”
“You handled that perfectly, Noah. He’s still innocent. You did good,” Cliff praised him.
May 2022
MJ was playing on his piano. Noah was watching him from the corner. It always made him smile to hear MJ play. MJ felt his dad’s eyes on him. He stopped and looked up at him.
“I have to tell you something,” MJ said.
“Anytime you’re ready, son,” Noah said.
“I’m straight,” he said.
“That’s hardly a surprise, MJ, but thank you for telling me,” Noah replied.
“I have a girlfriend, and we’ve been talking about having sex,” he said.
“Absolutely not! You’re too young. You have no idea what you’re doing,” Noah said.
“Wow, Dad, I thought you were a liberal,” MJ smirked.
“I’m not that progressive. Why are you rushing to have sex? I didn’t do it till I was eighteen,” Noah said.
“Right, and you’re still stuck on that same guy,” MJ said.
“He’s your dad, MJ.”
“You’re my dad. I’m not saying we’re doing it right now, but we’ve talked about it. I think we’re going to wait till prom, but we know we want it to be each other. I just don’t know how to put a condom on or any of that stuff.”
“Okay. I knew this day would come. Time to call your uncles. They are the sluts of the family.
November 2026
MJ was sitting by Noah’s bedside. There was a tube in Noah’s mouth. A bandage was wrapped around his head and covering his face. MJ took his dad’s hand.
“I’m so sorry. I just want you to wake up so I can tell you how much I love you and how bad I feel for the way I acted. I wasn’t mad at you. I’m sorry for everything I said to you. I love you. Please wake up. Please wake up.”
MJ wiped the tears from his eyes.
“I called my uncles. They should be here any minute now. Hopefully, they can convince you to wake up and be my dad again. Lola needs you. I need you. Daddy, please don’t go. Don’t leave me.”
The elevator dinged. The doors opened, and the three uncles stepped off and made their way down the hall. Lola was the first to spot them.
“My uncles,” she shouted.
May 2022
MJ was sitting on the sofa, and his three uncles were standing in front of him. There was a banana on the table and a box of condoms. Noah walked in a glass of wine and laughed when he saw them.
“This is how you plan on teaching my son,” he asked.
“You could be doing this yourself, Dominque,” said Trevor.
“Your dad went through more condoms than all of us,” Zane said. “I mean, they didn’t call him heartbreaker for nothing.”
“Oh, shut up. You were just as bad as I was, Zane,” Noah shouted. “Besides, this is what the uncles are for. They do my grunt work.”
“Look, MJ, let’s say the banana is your thing. You take the condom and…I can’t do this. I’m not teaching my nephew how to lose his virtue,” Terrick said. “Isn’t there YouTube or some shit to teach you?”
Everyone started laughing.
November 2026
Lola ran and hugged Trevor, Zane, and Terrick. Matthew entered from the other side. He had gone to get some fresh air. He stopped in his tracks when he saw all three men. The three were all stunned to see that Matthew was really alive.
Trevor said, “Noah said you were alive, but seeing you in the flesh is crazy.”
“Uncle Trevor, Uncle Zane, and Uncle Terrick,” MJ shouted as he ran and hugged them.
Matthew could understand Trevor being an uncle, maybe even Zane on some level, but how the hell did Noah and Terrick become such good friends that he would be considered an uncle? It really hit Matthew just how much things had changed in the last ten years, and he wondered what else could be waiting in the dark to be revealed.
TO BE CONTINUED...
© Grayson Rose 2025. All rights reserved.
