Apologies for the break in chapter, had some things going on and didn't want to lose the quality for this special chapter, hope you all enjoy and always love the feedback.
The Sydney Reconnection
Sitting there, I’m panicked because I know that I shouldn’t have had the thoughts I just did about my brother and Tyler, but now it feels harder to talk to him about Ollie than I thought, even though I didn’t intend to mention anything by name.
“Nothing, just forgot that I needed to do something for a job application that I probably should do now” I can see that the excuse isn’t going to wash with my brother. “It’s a Saturday and nothing is going to happen between now and when you get home because you’re going to be watching the game tonight” he says to me as I sigh.
I don’t know what to say as my tongue is tied trying to think about what I need to say without going into too much detail because I don’t want to spill too many details about Ollie and the fact my feelings are even there.
“Can we do something?” I say to Jake, he looks at me even more confused right now as I don’t know what to say, and he looks totally confused. “Alright Corey, YOU need to spill it and tell me what’s going on because you are never this distracted and off on another planet”, he says as I can see how serious he is because even as brothers, we’ve never really had any major arguments or disagreements with how close that we have always been.
Sitting there, I still don’t know what I’m going to say and realise how mentally I’m not prepared for this situation because I thought I had it under control, but that fantasy of Jake and Tyler together has really thrown me, and I don’t know what I’m going to say.
“Can we just forget it for a bit?” I say as Jake looks at me suspiciously but then nods his head, still not exactly convinced that we need to as I sit on his couch and have no idea what we are going to do.
Jake turns on his PS5 and looks at me. “I beat you in FIFA and you have to tell me what’s going on alright?” he says, chucking me the controller I .agree because even though it’s not total dominance that I have over him, my success rate is pretty strong against him so I don’t think the issue will come up.
The first game ends in a draw, and I get quietly confident that I don’t have to say anything until my brother beats me in the second game. Other than celebrating, it was like he actually won the grand final.
Jake looks at me “I won… so you need to tell me what is going on like you agreed”, he says as I don’t want to, but he looks at me. “You won the second game, didn’t win the first,”, I say, trying to plead my case to avoid talking to him, but he shakes his head.
“Pretty sure we agreed to me beating you at all”, he says as I roll my eyes, and he tells me that I don’t have to talk to him about what’s bothering me if I don’t want to, which is nice and understanding and we don’t for a while before finally, I start to realise that I need to let it out.
After about 4 or 5 games, I put the controller down and look at Jake and start to think about this and how I’m going to talk to him because he has this sixth sense like he can read my mind. “The thing is and this is talking generally ok… how did you know Tyler was the one you wanted to be with and started dating… generally?”
I see the look on my brother’s face, and he is totally surprised at me because I can sense that he thought that whatever I wanted to talk about was never going to be anything like this, but he nods his head.
Jake sits there thinking about it for a minute because I don’t think when he found out that I wanted to ask him something, that it would be something like this. I laugh and feel embarrassed as we sit there before Jake answers.
“I guess it’s just that you feel a special connection with that person, I think for me and Tyler it was probably the fact we had known each other for a while that helped but we just get each other and make the other feel good… at least I hope that’s what it is” he laughs with a bit of a nervous laugh.
“Given that you want to marry him, and I highly doubt he’d reject that, especially with the way that he loves you too,” I tell him as he smiles and hugs me, which suddenly this has become a chat about the two of them.
As we sit there, Jake goes back to the point: “It’s all subjective really when it comes to how you feel about someone because we all look for key factors in people, like some people go straight to looks and the body… I’m lucky on that one, but at the same time, for me, it’s just knowing that if something is wrong I can know that Tyler will make me feel better just by being here and all that sort of thing,” he says as I nod my head and put the context into how I feel when I was with Ollie and then when we are talking on the phone and the messages.
Jake looks across at me. “Why all the questions? Does my little brother have a little crush on someone?” he says, winking at me as I feel embarrassed, still not ready to talk about everything, not because it’s with another guy, but I just don’t know what to expect from all this because I don’t even know what you want.
“It’s not so much that, but I mean just asking overall because I suppose that if I do meet someone, then I haven’t really experienced that before”, I say, as my brother knows me too well to know that I’m not fully upfront with him and he looks at me sternly.
I sit there trying to plead the question had no other motives. “Come on Corey, I know you too well for a question like that to come out of nowhere, now come on something must have happened for you to ask that,” he says to me as I shrug and sigh.
The feeling of dread comes over me as I don’t know whether I can keep it a full secret or not, but I look at my brother, who has always been open with me, as I try to control what I have to say without giving too much away.
“It happened in London… I met a friend over there and got to know them really well, and we caught up and just did things… if you get my drift,” I say as Jake doesn’t take it in at first, then gets what I mean.
He looks confused initially, then realises, “Oh… OH…” he says, smirking at me as I roll my eyes and tell him I’m not going into details.
“I’m not going into details but the problem for a lack of a better word was the fact that like they’re Aussie who were living and working over there for a long time and we got really close while we were there and then being back home we’ve been continually talking but I just found out that they’re moving back to Australia and I don’t know what they are wanting or anything” I tell Jake.
Sitting there, I can see him thinking about what he wants to say because it’s a unique situation, and for me, it’s eating me up inside that I don’t know how to deal with it because I could be breaking Ollie’s heart if he wanted something to happen and I don’t then will it hurt him.
Thinking about it at the same point, what happens if I say yes that I wanted something to happen to go further and it finished our friendship because we weren’t meant to be a couple like that or what if I wanted to say yes but he didn’t want anything serious as he said that romance wasn’t in his plans.
Jake puts his hand on my leg. “Little bro, romance isn’t always perfect in life, and sometimes you luck out finding the right person straight away, or sometimes it takes a while, and for some people, you just never find it”, he says as I nod my head and realise that the point that my brother makes is important to remember.
“Why don’t we go up to the cricket for a bit and have a beer,” Jake says to lighten the mood and I nod my head as I follow him up the block to North Sydney Oval, and we head in to watch a bit of the NSW V Tasmania game to lighten the mood.
The rest of the afternoon is pretty chilled for the most part as we sit there. “So, how’s everything else going?” he says to me as I shrug. “Yeah, it’s going alright, you know, plenty of work shifts, especially after the Grand Final and all that but trying to get that full-time job is hard because doors are barely open to you, especially when you have to tell them where you’re from and not a prominent name,” I say as Jake looks at me and nods his head.
“I get that, I mean, yeah, I’m in the field that I wanted to be into for a long time, but it’s not exactly a dream job starting a shift at midnight most nights when Tyler starts at 9 am but leaves you know at 8… gets hard because we barely get that time together,” he says as I nod my head and think about Ollie again with the fact he’s going to be flying so much.
The rest of the afternoon is good fun between the two of us, just chilling like brothers should before we head back to his apartment, he tells me he’ll order Pizza, which Tyler would frown at, but it’s the weekend, after all.
It’s about 9 pm when Tyler gets back, and I’m getting ready to go. “Thanks for this afternoon, bro…. I really needed it,” I say as he smiles. “I don’t know what I did to help, but it’s always good to be able to help you”, Jake says as I walk back to the station and head home.
The house is peaceful when I get in, and I see that Mum won’t be home for a while and Dad is at work all night, so I just throw my clothes off and keep the doors locked and just walk around naked, which feels freeing right now.
Walking around the house naked feels good right now as I look down at my body and feel so good about myself, having hit the gym a fair bit in recent weeks as I text Ollie:
Me: “Hey… you home today?”
I say as he hasn’t mentioned anything about his schedule for a few days, which isn’t normal, but I mean, he doesn’t have to tell me everything like we aren’t a couple or married, so he doesn’t have to tell me, but I always appreciate it.
Ollie: “Hey you, sorry I haven’t messaged but it’s been non-stop work and trying to organise to get everything back to Australia which is going to be weird.”
Me: “I totally understand it, what’s happening with all that?”
Ollie: “Well I’ve got 3 weeks left working for Virgin Atlantic and then a week to finalise everything before heading back.”
Me: “Cool, well if I’m holding you up at all.”
Ollie: “Nah, I’m in a hotel in St Vincent at 6am so I’m not doing anything”
Me: “Ooh the Caribbean nice”
Ollie: “It’s alright, one of the long flights and awkward but you know”
Me: “You got your own room? 😏”
Ollie: “Yeah, why?”
I send a suggestive selfie
Ollie: “Oh my”
Me: “Home alone for a while tonight and why wear clothes?”
Ollie: “Exactly”
The two of us talk for a little while, messaging as there isn’t anything too exciting about the flirting until I can hear the car door of my Mum getting home being the catalyst to put my shorts on even though I’m still shirtless it’s fine as I lay on my bed.
The next few weeks are a bit of a bore as I’m trying to get my head around what is going to happen and with Ollie because, in London, it was a lot more freeing because nobody knew who I was, and there wasn’tweren’t any questions of what we were doing or anyone seeing. However, in Sydney, it’s a totally different story because this is more permanent, and we can’t really go anywhere as a couple because there is always going to be a chance that we see someone who knows them, and I’m not ready for it.
The time has flown, and it’s only a week until Ollie gets back to Sydney permanently I know his family is going to monopolise his time early, but he keeps telling me that he wants to make special time for us to be together, and he keeps hinting that it’s going to be more than just a dinner and beers catch-up.
I’m curious about what he is planning, but at the same time, I decide that I can’t just keep sitting here worrying about what is going to happen and come up with a plan when I find out that Jake and Tyler are going to New Zealand for a week and at the very least Ollie and I can use their place.
I text my brother:
Me: “Hey bro, My friend I told you about gets into Sydney this week a couple of days before you go to New Zealand and I was wondering if I could introduce them to you and while you’re away we could use your place?”
I haven’t got a response from Jake for a while, but given the time, it makes sense given that he had the night shift again, so he is probably sleeping I’m not going to worry about him replying straight away to my text, but then think about Ollie coming back and how excited it makes me.
I’ve had some close friends, but since meeting Ollie, our friendship has blossomed, and other than Jake, who, despite being my older brother, has been my best friend for all my life, I don’t think I’ve talked to anyone as much as I have so far.
My brother finally texts back a few hours later after I’ve been to the gym, and I’m sitting on the bench in the locker room looking at some of the other hot guys around as my eyes are definitely now focused on guys a lot more than what they used to be.
Jake: “Of course bro, can’t wait to meet the girl that has my brother so flustered, hope she’s a good surprise.”
I just laugh at my brother’s text, especially given the fact that he says that he wants to meet the girl and she’s a good surprise when really my “girl” is actually a 6’0, muscled, tanned Aussie male flight attendant with some of the best abs I’ve ever seen that I have fallen for so much.
The next week is a drag with another job interview, and it just feels like forever for me to see Ollie as I wish I could go to the airport to meet him, but his family are all going to be there, and I’d be overshadowed especially as we’re not romantically involved and his family would be asking too many questions because they are pushing him to settle down and get into a relationship again despite him saying that he doesn’t want to have another one for a while.
It gets to Wednesday morning, I’ve set my alarm early not because I’m going to the airport but because I want to track Ollie’s flight coming into Sydney and make sure that he gets back safely, which I mean is stupid because he is going to be 100% fine coming in and he said that he would text me once he lands.
Laying in bed, I watch The Simpsons on Disney Plus as a normal adult would, and my phone buzzes just after 7 am.
Ollie: “Home sweet home… can’t wait to see you”
Me: “Mmm, I really want to see you now”
Ollie: “If I get a chance to sneak out, wanna get coffee this afternoon?”
Me: “Yeah sounds good, just keep me updated”
The fact that Ollie wants to see me today, even if it is for just coffee, feels good to see him, and I don’t even know where it will be if it happens. I’m in bed for most of the morning as both my parents are at work for most of the day, so I keep as little on as possible for the day before having an impromptu gym session so that I look good for Ollie once we catch up.
Unfortunately, things get a bit jammed for Ollie, and we don’t get to have coffee, so I have to wait until Friday to see him, but it’s going to be amazing when we do because he has made sure that he doesn’t have any plans at all and I want to make sure that it’s just us together. The two of us are going to have so much fun, and all my nerves are shaken out of my system now as I’m excited for the catch-up to see him in person a few months after our last catch-up, even though we’ve been video chatting.
Friday afternoon comes, and I have no idea what I should be even doing or what I’m going to wear as I put in a gym session, which has become an obsession lately and even though I haven’t noticed any changes in my body, there’s been a few comments about my body lately which makes me feel so much more confident.
Ollie: “Hey, what time and where do you want to meet up?”
Me: “Is it cool if we hit my brothers place up? I want you to meet him and Tyler if he’s there before the go to New Zealand… is that alright?”
Ollie: “Fuck yeah, I want to meet this amazing brother of your and see if he’s all he’s cracked up to be.”
Me: “Cool, How about we meet at Central at about 3:30ish and then get the metro?”
Ollie: “You’re the tour guide these days”
Me: “Can’t wait to see you”
The plans are set for the afternoon, and I still struggle with what I’m going to wear before deciding on just a black t-shirt and denim shorts before heading out and getting to Central station just after 3 pm and waiting for Ollie under the information screens as I stand there waiting for him as time goes by and passes 3:30 as I’m worried he has stood me up.
I check my phone, wondering where he could be when I feel a hand on my shoulder, and a voice whispers into my ear, “Looking for me sexy” I hear and jump as I turn around and see Ollie standing there looking so different to what I remember from London now as what was.
Ollie’s buzz cut had been replaced by a sharp style, with the sides cut short and the top left longer. The longer strands were pushed back and up, giving it that messy but somehow perfect look, like he’d just run his fingers through it but still managed to pull off something effortlessly cool.
Even though we had been video chatting, it was usually on my end with the camera because he would tell me that he was waiting for me to see him as he wanted to show me the changes he was making. I stand there as he squeezes my arm. “Doesn’t look like I’m the only one with changes”, he says as he looks around, and even though he spent time just a few months ago in Sydney, he’s like a tourist.
I show him the way to the Metro, and he is stunned at how Sydney has this new system. As we keep talking and I show him to the way to my brother’s place in North Sydney. “I know that I’ve been living overseas for so long that I’m not used to Sydney but it’s like I’ve just gone somewhere I have no idea and is unrecognisable”, he says as I glare at him about changing because he looks so different.
The two of us get to the station near my brother’s place and get off as the nerves kick in right now as Ollie squeezes my hand “How much did you tell your brother because we don’t need to tell him anything about what we did”
Standing to the side as we get out of the exit he, taps his Opal card off, “Well I wasn’t mentioning anything but my brother reads me like a book and he kinda pulled it out of me because I was just talking and then it sort of came out though he doesn’t know about you personally… I just told him it was a friend and like my questions were pretty obvious”.
Ollie looks at me and squeezes my hand again. “Whatever happens is just that… Your brother seems cool and I mean you kept his secret for so long that I don’t think he is going to run out and tell anyone right?” I laugh.
We walk to my brother’s apartment building, and I stand there nervous again as Ollie looks around. “I don’t think I’ve been to this part of town since I came to North Sydney Oval as a kid for some reason”, he says, laughing as I tell him that’s only a block up the road from where we are.
I text Jake that we’re here and buzz myself up to his place before I go upstairs with Ollie and, take a huge breath and knock on the door, not sure what is going to happen as my brother is expecting me to be there with this girl that I met and instead, I’m standing with a guy older than my brother who I’m romantically attracted to.
Jake opens the door. “Hey bro…” he says and stops before he sees Ollie standing there, and I can tell he is surprised. “This is Oliver or better call him Ollie”, I say with a smile as my brother adjusts his mood and puts his hand out to shake Ollie’s hand as he shows us in.
I look at Jake as Ollie walks in and shares the usual pleasantries about how nice the place is Ja.ke looks at me with a smirk on his face. I know my brother is not usually speechless, but he is right now. Ollie looks at Jake. “I’m guessing that he didn’t tell you that his friend was another guy, did he?” I run my hand over my face as Ollie talks.
“Nah he didn’t, I mean you could pretty much tell that by my reaction”, he says as things are a bit awkward, but I don’t think it’s any distrust or dislike between the two it’s just the shock of who Ollie is that has made my brother so surprised.
Things go ok for a little while as Tyler gets home. “Hey babe, hey Core”, he says as Jake gets up and kisses him on the cheek as Jake introduces Ollie. “This is Corey’s friend that you know he wanted us to meet,” I say as Tyler has the same shock on his face that my brother did when Ollie introduced himself.
Sitting on the couch, my brother makes some drinks for us as we sit there just chatting with music going, “So Ollie, tell me about yourself and what you do… plus how did you two meet?” Jake asks.
I didn’t expect him to be asking all the questions that he did, which is annoying because it was supposed to be casual, but at the same time, I know my brother isn’t going to be giving Ollie too much of an interrogation, but just more curiosity and trying to protect his little brother.
“Umm well I don’t know what Corey has told you but given the reaction and what we’ve talked about it’s nothing”, he says, laughing as I can sense the nerves coming out of him. “I’m 29, lived in the UK for three years but coming back home to be around family and friends, I’m a flight attendant worked for Jetstar and Virgin Atlantic but coming home for a change.”
I try to get some idea about how my brother is feeling, but he doesn’t give much of a reaction we sit there for a while just talking before it gets to about 7 pm when my brother has to get ready because he has work tonight.
“This has been fun but I’ve got to get ready for work, sorry about that,” Jake says as he takes his shirt off as Tyler looks, and I look across at them. “Aren’t you going to New Zealand tomorrow?” I say as they nod because I was thinking why would Jake be working.
“Yeah, but I’m only there until 5 am and then come home and fly out about 1 pm because we’re going on the 787” I can see that Ollie is intrigued by the travel talk, which is good and a bit of an ice-breaker between the two of them as I follow Jake into his room as he closes the door and strips out of his pants into his Black CK boxers as he sits on the bed.
Watching my brother, I don’t know what to say, but I just ask, “So?” and try to get a response as he smiles. “I mean, he was a bit of a surprise, I had no idea you were part of the team”, he says, laughing as I hit him on the arm, and it doesn’t do a lot of damage on his big arms.
“I don’t know if I exactly feel like on the same team but yeah there is just something amazing about him, we met on the plane he was sitting next to me and we just were chatting and he was nice then offered to show me around London and I’d never felt like that about someone” Jake nods his head approving.
“That’s good, because I can see that he really cares about you because the way he was talking, I could read it in his eyes, and I know I get all the questions because I can see how you two looked at each other”, Jake’s approval is good because I mean it worried me knowing that my “boyfriend” for lack of a better term is seven years older than me and older than my brother.
I sit next to my brother and hug him, appreciative of how approving he is as I sit there “I don’t know what to think about where we are going you know because I’ve never been in love with someone before and I didn’t think that I would ever be with a guy you know but he has just taught me about me and makes me happy”.
Jake sits there and nods “And there is your answer to the question you had, then that’s how you know when the person you are with is the one that you want to be with,” he says as I smile and feel so much better about everything and know that I’ve introduced my brother and should things go well between the two of us, then I can go ahead with the romance side of the situation.
I get up to go out as Jake turns “Bro… you got amazing taste because Ollie is fucking hot” I laugh and feel embarrassed as Tyler and Ollie are still talking about planes and contrasting experiences, which I mean is good that my soon-to-be brother-in-law is going to get along with Ollie and as long as it doesn’t turn romantic which I know it won’t it’ll be good.
Jake heads into the bathroom as I come back into the living room and don’t interrupt the conversation as they sit there while Jake is changed and getting ready for work when finally, Tyler and Ollie stop their conversation, and we all say our goodbyes, and Jake gives me the instructions if I want to use his place while they’re gone.
Ollie and I head downstairs as I feel a lot better about that. “Was that alright for you?” I say to him, as I feel like he would probably be annoyed at all the questions, and he smiles. “I enjoyed it, you talk about your brother so much and his partner that I wanted to meet them and they seem really cool and I hope that they liked me”, he asks back.
“Given that Tyler was enjoying that conversation with you, I think that I’m going to have to keep my eye on them trying to bring you into their little circle and forget about me”, I say as Ollie laughs and puts his arms over my shoulders looking into my eyes as we stand in the street that isn’t too busy.
I see him smile before he kisses me. “There’s only one guy that I’m in love with right now”, he says with a wink and smile before he kisses me again as I smile and look at him “Good… because I think he loves you right back”.
