University has a shitty way of taking all your attention, like it really matters. Oh sure, I suppose bearing down and really learning what the fuck Aristotle was saying is good and all, but really. Does the world care?
Mark, poor guy, was ankle-deep in literature from the getgo. He had papers due and a seminar to present. I felt for him. I remember the first days of my undergrad – at least when I wasn't baking myself into a nice haze. But I knew he would get through it. He seemed like a pretty brainy guy.
I was kind of fucked-up about jerking off next to him that night. I hadn't done that when I roomed with Anton, that's for sure. There was no repeats, at least when Mark was around. I saved it up for when he was at class and rubbed out a few really nice ones.
When we were in the room together, or having lunch, or grabbing a beer down the street, we shot the proverbial shit really well. For all his buttoned-down ways, he was a great guy to talk to.
One afternoon when we were Perking at the Lot (which is how we talked about the place: lame, right?) I decided to push my luck, which, as people have told me is kinda my thing. I said, “So Mark...seen any dudes you want to bone?”
The guy nearly jumped out of his chair and I kicked myself in the nuts a few times wishing I had kept my mouth shut. What the fuck was wrong with me? But I had to hand it to him, he recovered.
“Is it that obvious?”
He asked a good question. “Well, when your brother is gay you get to know what to look for.”
I could see this rattling around in his head for a while. He sipped his coffee. “I suppose...” Then the fucker surprised me. “Was it hard when your brother came out?”
Oh, I guess things are getting real. “Naw. Not hard. I think I knew it and were just waiting for him to say something. He was amazing, all defiant and ready to fight but then, when I just told him he was awesome, he got a little weepy and hugged me. Like I said, my brother is the best.”
“You have any girlfriends?”
He wasn't going to let up, was he? I sighed and drank some coffee. Shit they make a nice brew. “I had one last year but she left town...”
“That must have sucked.”
“Yeah, you could say that.”
We both got lost in some crazy hole in our minds, then finally I looked at him. “You ever have a boyfriend?”
Now I really felt I put both feet and part of an arm in it. I thought he was going to implode right there. He was crushing one of his hands with the other like it going to attack him if he didn't hold it down. I was about to brush it off when he looked back at me. “No. Not yet.”
The little bastard could really drive a stake through your heart saying things like that. How could such a sweet guy not have lured someone into his pants?
I made like it was no biggie, which it wasn't. “Hey man, you'll be fighting them off in no time. Just let it happen.”
I was speaking from experience. Mandy's brother Kyle – poor guy – was all over me. I was flattered and everything, and after a few beer even entertained it. Come on, what straight dude hasn't had his moments? If my brother has taught me anything, is that straight is never all straight and gay is never...well you get the picture. I really believe that. So with Kyle...if I had had one more beer...but it never happened. But I think on the whole Kinsey-metre I think I'm pretty straight. That's what the girls tell me, anyway.
And then his sister stepped in. Mandy was relentless and at first I wasn't into it, but you know how these things go. One night she kissed me and then ripped off my pants. What's a guy to do?
But what was my point? Oh yeah, just letting things happen. This is what Mark needed to do. Looking at his Maui-surf-coloured eyes, I wasn't so sure he could. Not yet. He looked like someone asked him to fly the space shuttle.
The weather was becoming really shitty, all rain and grey and bad karma. I mean this isn't the nicest town on the planet, but when the rain is pissing down? Well fuck. It's better to stay inside. We both sank into our books and didn't have much fun.
So October was looking pretty shitty and Thanksgiving looked like it was coming in with nothing but crap. Most of the residence went home to some cozy feeding frenzy, but Mark and I and a few others stayed put. And just to be clear, this is Canadian Thanksgiving, fuckers.
Saturday came and we were both flaked on our beds reading. Enough ontological bullshit. I needed escapism and had my nose in a mystery. But Mark threw his book on the floor and got off the bed. “I can't stay here any longer. I'm going to the gym.”
“Don't work too hard, man. It's bad for you.”
“Yeah, well. We'll see.”
He left and I dozed off feeling pretty comfy.
I woke up to the sound of the door slamming. Mark stood in the middle of the room like he'd been taken over by an evil alien or something: eyes wide and a fucked-up expression on his face.
“What's up, dude?”
He looked at me like he didn't know me. “Uh...I just had a weird experience. Um...in the showers.”
I could tell right then. It happens, and I guess what didn't cross my mind was that it hadn't happened to him: I guess until now.
“Right...some guy wanted to play in the shower?”
“How did you...fuck!”
I had never heard him drop an f-bomb so I knew this was serious. “Did you want to play along?”
With a kind of desperate look on his face, he threw himself on his bed. “I don't know? Yes? Maybe?”
“Dude, take a breath. It's cool. There's no wrong answer. Maybe you did, maybe you didn't...”
“Yeah, but I almost did. I mean...” and he looked at me like I was going to call the cops or something, but he kept going. “...I like, let him...suck me...for a second...but I freaked out and ran.”
Wow. I knew this took a lot for him to say. Like, he knew me, but not that well. I was also kinda happy he did tell me, if I'm honest, which I always am, right? Anyway, I took a breath and went into camp counsellor mode. “Mark, dude. It's all good. Chill.” Then I thought we needed some external help and by that I mean a nice fattie. I pulled my trusty bag of tricks out of my drawer and stood up. “We're going outside, stat. You need to get baked and I'm going to get baked and the world with look way better in no time. Come on.”
We stood in drizzle and shared a nice one. Mark had some coughing fits which in this case was good thing because I knew he would be off his face in no time. After a few minutes I looked over to check his vitals, which were starting to look not so bad. “Well think of it this way. Next time some guy offers to suck you off in the shower, you'll know what to do, right?”
He looked at me, his eyes starting to look like he hadn't slept in a few days: a good sign. “Will I?”
“Of course. You'll fucking let him! What else would you do?” Then I thought for a second, not wanting to narrow the field too much. “Or...maybe you want to be the one to go deep on a dude. Whichever. This was just the first step.”
His eyes were half closed and for a second I wondered if he didn't believe me, but then I decided he was just starting that mellow road to the land of stoned. I took the joint from him and had a nice toke, holding it in and trying not to notice the rain that was pissing on our heads.
He finally said, “We need to get inside. I'm soaked.”
“Right you are.” I put the spliff out and stowed it in my magic bag and we went inside.
Remember what I said about being stoned and getting fucking horny? Well, yeah, that happened. I sat on my bed thinking strategically. Either I wait until the middle of the night and jack off like I was in church camp, or...
“Hey, Mark. Given you had a lame sexual experience and I like to get friendly with myself when I'm stoned, why don't we just share the space?”
I looked over at him on the bed, and his face was like...unreadable. He didn't say a word for a few seconds like I had just insulted his grandmother. Then I saw him do something inside that head of his and he said, “Like...together?”
“That's what I'm saying. Come on, it'll be cool. Call it bonding or finishing what that guy in the shower started. Whatever you want. Just a little porn and all will be well.” I decided not to wait for an answer. I was really fuckin' baked.
I pulled out my laptop and tossed it on the bed. I was kind of on a one track freight train and could't care if he was with me or not. Well, not really. I thought it would be cool if he did.
I pulled off my pants and underwear and got comfy against the wall. He was just watching me, his eyes all big and hypnotized. “Dude...let's do this!”
He slid off his bed and crawled up beside me. I could tell he was having trouble looking at me, but he slid out of his jeans and folded them way too neatly and put them beside him. He looked at me for a second, glancing at my junk and my dick which was kind of half hard. Did I make a really bad call here? But that part of my brain was about to go for coffee, so I ignored the thought.
He pulled his blue boxers down and leaned against the wall like he had just run a marathon. I took a look at what he was packing which was not bad at all. Kinda muscular and pretty long, not too hairy. Oh and totally fuckin' chubbed up. He face looked like he wasn't into it, but that part of him had some other plans. I grinned at him and turned to my laptop.
I scrolled through some possibilities on that site that everyone and their fucking dog uses, to see what might work. I didn't want to scare him with full on straight fun, that would be totally rude. So I looked for some bi-stuff that every once in a while is kinda fun. Remember what I said earlier? So, like, once every few months it works for me.
I found a nice one where everyone gets to do something to everyone. I wanted to be ecumenical so everyone could a have fuckin' nice time.
“So let me know if this, like, works for you. I can totally change it if it doesn't.”
Without waiting, I just hit 'play' and sat back for the ride. It was no Oscar winner, but everyone was having fun. Two not-too-beefy dudes were kissing this woman with nice tits and they went from there. The blond guy was eating her out, the brown haired guy was sucking the other guy's cock, then she was sucking both of their cocks while they necked. It was all good. I was into it.
I looked down at my prick which was getting really pumped. I picked up my lube and gave myself a squirt 'cause I like things slippery. I turned to Mark and he was in some kind of trance, jacking his cock with his mouth half open and staring at the action on the screen. “Want some?”
I didn't wait and just poured lube on his cock. He looked all startled at me for a second. Then I could tell it was totally working for him and he smiled as he stroked himself. I was beginning to suspect there was a demon inside that cute bookworm.
Things on the screen were getting busy. The one guy was totally plowing the other whose face was hidden because the girl was basically sitting on his head. “'Dude! How can he breathe?”
Mark should patent that laugh of his 'cause it's like the sun comes out for a second. I had to smile. I was really into this. It felt like the best kind of bro time and not in the shitty jock kind of way that shitheads like Anton have, but in the warm and fuzzy, two-guys-hanging-and-working-their-wieners kind of way. I was getting pretty hot under the hood and I kinda stopped focusing on the crazy shit on the screen and just stared into nothing, totally sailing on the buzzing in my cock, then without realizing it, on Mark's hand moving in time with my own, the end of his dick all wet and desperate.
Then I kinda forgot about almost everything except the little conversation the tip of my dick was having with the rest of my body and fuck it felt nice! I leaned my head against the wall and shut my eyes. I could kind of smell what? Guy, I guess. Those smells of guys: sweat and heat and something kinda musky.
This was new. But it cranked up the volume of the angel choir that was singing in my cock. I knew I wasn't long for the world.
I took another glance at Mark and totally caught him checking me out. But that was cool, totally fair. He was into dudes and I am certainly a dude. So let him look if it gets him to heaven a little sooner.
There was something about that totally stoned thought that really set me going and I could feel a whole bunch of things happening at the base of my cock and in a secret place in my ass and my whole fuckin' body started to catch fire or something and I had to make some noises but I couldn't tell you what they sounded like. My hand wanted to move faster to keep up with the high speed crazy town that went off in my whole body and I squeezed my eyes shut, feeling amazing – I mean fucking amazing – pleasure bombs go off and I felt my cock start blasting out, pulsing right across my chest into my face, past my face, fuckin' everywhere. I hadn't spunked like that since I was in high school. Fuck!
I opened my eyes to survey the damage just as Mark went into space and he threw back his head and hit the wall while he almost choked. His cock really let loose. I mean really fuckin' spewed all over the place: his forehead, his nose, his chin, drooling down his neck. Jesus this kid had reserves of the stuff. His balls must have extra storage or something. I think it even hit me, the little fucker.
He stopped moving and he seemed kinda frozen, dripping, just his chest heaving like he ran a thousand metres in two fucking seconds.
“Mark, my man! That was awesome! You are the champion!”
He looked at me, cum all over his face. I had to laugh 'cause he looked so goofy. Like some dude from a bad porn flick from the seventies. Yeah, I've watched them. My brother made me.
He tried to laugh, but his cum dripped into his mouth and he stopped, kinda startled. I'd be lying if I wasn't amazed when he licked his lips with a little grin on his cheeky face. “I made a mess...”
I burst out laughing. “You fuckin' did!” I chuckled some more and I ran my finger through the puddle on my chest, licking my fingers clean. I like my cum. It tastes healthy. Like it's good for me.
We were both a mess. I glanced at the screen just in time to see one of the guys shoot into the mouths of the other two. Nice. Always a good finale.
I grabbed my underwear and started to wipe myself down, like some horse who just ran a big race. When I was more or less cum-free, I tossed the shirt to Mark. He looked unsure, but started doing the same. I think he had more to clean up than I did!
He handed my underwear back and it was totally sopping wet. I threw it on the floor. “I guess I'm doing laundry tomorrow.”
Mark chuckled and shook his head. “Sam, that was...amazing.”
“Right? What did I tell you.” I threw my arm around his sweaty shoulder. “That was totally cool. Thanks man.” I suddenly felt confused for a second, like I didn't know what to do next. I shook my head and got off the bed.
He got up and walked a little unsteadily across to his bed. He more or less collapsed on top of his blanket, face down. His ass seemed really white compared to the bedspread. It was kind of startling.
I put the computer away, stowed my lube and slid under my blanket. I felt like being cozy and the bed felt a bit empty. But having friends around is way cool, right? It felt really nice. As I sunk into sleep I looked over at him lying there. What a cool dude, a really nice guy. Then I slept.
After the holidays, things went back to normal. I guess in this case normal is reading, and writing fucking papers on Hegel. Who does that? I mean, who the fuck was Hegel to be telling us what things mean anyway? I guess I'm more into the whole meaning is in the eye of a beholder way of thinking. But the dude had some cool ideas. I'll tell you sometime.
Mark was pretty cool about our little jack-off session. He didn't mention it, but I got the feeling it chilled him out. When we hung out if felt pretty mellow and he told me more about his shitty father, among other things. Poor guy. That's rough having a dad like that.
I told him about Mandy but I decided to leave her brother out of it for now. I didn't want to confuse him. Not that anything happened, but you get the picture.
We were hanging in the Perking Lot just shooting the shit when I saw this dude come in and check Mark out. I mean totally check him out. You know the kind of look I mean. And Mark? Well it was like he had seen a ghost. Suddenly I guessed it. This was the dude from the shower! Now things were getting interesting.
Mark turned back to me trying to pretend he hadn't seen the guy. Like an ass, I said, “Hey Mark...that wouldn't be the guy from the shower, would it?”
His eyes totally widened. I mean like in novels kind of widened. But true to form, he managed to say, “Yeah. That's him. He was totally cruising me wasn't he?”
“He sure as hell was! Go! Go make contact. I'll be right here minding my own business.”
“You think I should?”
“Don't think, just do. That is a good motto to have. Go.”
So he went and he sat down at the table with the guy and they talked for a while. I could almost see Mark cooling down and chilling out. Good lad. He's getting the hang of it.
He came back after a bit, a little smile on his face. Adorable. “So...?”
“So what?” All innocent like.
“So are you two getting together to exchange pie recipes?”
“'Something like that...”
He was playing it all suave, the little shit. But kudos to Mark. He put himself out there and went for round two with...? “What's his name?”
“Robert.”
“'Round two with Robert. Awesome!”
We walked back to residence and it totally started to snow. Fuck! It was still October. That felt nasty. But as we got closer to the residence, I felt a kind of hollow thing lurking in the bottom of my stomach. What was that all about?
