Well, I certainly did fuck up. I know I should have done better out in public with Jace. I disappointed him in front of my sister. The truth is, while I am comfortable with myself as a self-identified faggot, I am still finding my footing in public spaces. I’ve reflected now and realized that Jace was only trying to help me. Instead of doing my best to embrace my identity inward and outward, I was ashamed and showed hesitation and outright resistance.
Jace was right to deny me his cock the other night. He was right to torment me, dangling it in my face and making me smell his musk leaving me with a deep sense of want that is almost painful to ignore. I understand that now, I was not thinking clearly at the time.
I know in order to get back in Jace’s good graces I’m gonna have to eat some humble pie. I am going to have to do something very drastic. I need to convince Jace I’m worthy of his time and attention and of course, cock worthy. I also know I’m going to have to act swiftly before he takes on another faggot. There’s a million of us out there and I don’t want anyone else moving in on my Sir without a fight.
I decided I would spend the entire weekend in “straight” places showing off my new collar and “faggot” charm and I’d wear my “LOCKED FAGGOT” shirt every where I went. I would document specific encounters and send the video evidence to Jace, even FaceTime him if he wanted to witness me outing myself as a faggot to anyone that would listen.
I took a few snapshots of myself at work that Friday of me in various locations in the office showing off my collar, or I should say, Jace’s collar. I made sure that in every pose I had the biggest of smiles on my face, proudly displaying my status thought the day.
I even recorded a conversation with a coworker who asked me about the collar.
“Why are you wearing that thing around your neck?”
“Because I’m proud of being a faggot and want everyone to know it. My Sir gave it to me.”
I said the same statement several more times throughout the day but only recorded it the first time. It sounded more sincere and less robotic.
After work, I removed my work shirt and revealed the LOCKED FAGGOT shirt. I went to the grocery store and snapped more selfies. My cock was attempting to harden once more as I roamed the aisles. It was so liberating to be my authentic self .
An older male approached me by the frozen food aisle and said, “Son, in my day you’d be beaten to a pulp for wearing something like in public. Have you no shame?”
I responded, “No, Sir. I have no shame. I am proud to be a locked faggot!”
I wished I had taken out my phone but it happened too quickly to get it recorded.
That night I called my sister and recorded our conversation.
“Hey faggot, what’s up?”
“Hi sis, hey I need to apologize for my behavior the other night. I suppose I’m still somewhat ashamed to admit to the world that I am a faggot. I should not have been that way with you. You’ve always accepted me for what I am.”
“It’s ok, faggot. Just make sure you apologize to Sir Jace. It’s not my forgiveness that you really need. Hey I gotta run, talk soon!”
The next morning I went to get coffee at Starbucks. When they asked for a name for my order, I said, “faggot”. The cashier couldn’t stifle her laugh. “Seriously?”, she asked. Then I pointed to my shirt and she knew I was serious. I’d captured that one on my phone.
It was time to connect again with Jace and to show him I was making amends. I sent him a message.
“GM, Sir”
“Yes, and”
“Sir, I owe you a huge apology. I realized now that my own shame made me behave badly. I embarrassed you as my Sir. I understand now why you denied me your cock. I was unworthy. I’ve been making amends ever since to show you just how much I love being your faggot.
I sent him pics and videos as proof of my remedial actions. All of them.
My phone rang, it was him, Sir Jace!
“This is a good start, but you ain’t earned my dick yet.”
“No Sir. I know.”
“I don’t think you do. Tell you what, I’m gonna help you out because I’m feeling generous today. If you do this one thing we’ll put all of this behind us. You want my dick again, right?”
“Always Sir.”
“Of course you do, what faggot wouldn’t? But your not just any faggot, your my faggot. Isn’t that right? Tell me you’re my faggot.”
“I’m your faggot, Sir!”
“Where are you right now?”
“On my way to the gym, Sir.”
“That’s not what I asked. Are you stupid? I ain’t got no time for a dumbass faggot. Try again, where are you right now?”
“I am walking on the street on my way to the gym from Starbucks, Sir.”
“That’s much better. That wasn’t so hard. Here’s what I want you to do right now, I want you to scream at the top of your lungs right now, I’m your faggot, Sir! Scream it out, let the world know.”
“Ummm…”
“Um, um nothing. Don’t think, just do. Do it now or you’re never getting this dick ever again!”
I held the phone away from my lips, took a deep breath and shouted as loud as I could, “I AM YOU’RE FAGGOT, SIR!”
Everyone on the street looked at me like I was insane. And maybe I was insane? Insanely in lust with Jace and his cock and would do anything to be his faggot.
“That was beautiful, faggot. Very, very good. But that wasn’t the one thing I wanted you to do to get all this unnecessary drama behind us.”
My cock was literally leaking like a faucet. I never knew how much degrading myself in public would keep me in a constant state of arousal. I’m sure wearing a dick lock for almost 11 months straight also alters one’s mind, too. My heart raced with excitement as I hung on Jace’s every word. What would be this one final act that would erase the past and convince Jace I was once again worthy of him.
“Yes Sir. Whatever it is, I’ll do it. I promise!”
“Are you sure of that, faggot? You don’t even know what it is! What if I asked you to rob a bank? You would do it?”
“I would try. I would do it for you, Sir.”
“I appreciate that, but we both know I’d never ask you to do that. There’s no lesson in that. No, these things I’ve had you do, they are all for you, to help you be who you are. Do I take pleasure in you doing these things? Of course, that’s part of the fun for me!”
“Thank you, Sir. Thank you for not asking me to rob a bank.”
“You’re welcome. But let’s see if you thank me after this. Didn’t you say your cousin is getting married next weekend?”
“Yes Sir.”
“Yes, you most certainly did. I’m sure this is a formal affair. Is it not?”
“Yes Sir. I was going to wear a suit and tie.”
“No, I don’t think you will be wearing a suit and tie at all. I think you’ll be wearing your new shirt and some dress slacks. Only men wear suits and ties. What were you thinking?”
“Sir, you want me to go to a family event wearing the “LOCKED FAGGOT” t-shirt? My parents will disown me.”
“You’re always so melodramatic. Did you not learn anything at all in the last 48 hours? Whether your parents disown you or not is irrelevant. They downtown you anyway, I do. Isn’t that right? Announce yourself to your entire family, be yourself. There’s no reason to hide it from anyone.”
“And if I do it, then I can suck your dick again, Sir? I miss it so much.”
“Well, that’s just one part of it. There’s one more piece to a full realization of your actual self. I want you to FaceTime me when you get there, I want to see you in your shirt and your collar, and then I’ll tell you the last step. You got that, faggot?”
“Yes Sir. So I have to wait a week to see you again?”
“Did you really just ask me that? Honestly, I don’t even know if you’re worthy of my time. Who do you think you are?”
“I’m so sorry, Sir. I’m sorry!”
“Tell me what you are! Say it again for me!”
“I’m your faggot, Sir!”
“Again, louder!”
“I’m your faggot, Sir!”
“Once more!”
“I’m your faggot, Sir!”
“That’s right!”
Then he hung up on me. Once again, desperation hit me hard. I felt like I was going through cock withdrawal. I wasn’t even in the mood to use any of my toys. It was going to be a torturous week and it was. It felt as if time was dripping slowly.
By the time Friday arrived I had a complete metamorphosis. I was full of dread in the early part of the week. I didn’t want to show up at my cousin’s wedding wearing a “LOCKED FAGGOT” shirt. I was alright with the FAGGOT charm on my collar, but the shirt was a step too far. But by Thursday, I was actually looking forward to wearing it prominently and proudly. I began to think that as a faggot, in society, we are low on the totem pole of men, and dressing up in a suit and tie would have been disingenuous, a bold faced lie. A cover up for my true faggot identity. Faggots don’t wear suits and ties, Sir Jace was right. So, yes, I was definitely going to show up in something more worthy of my station.
The morning of the wedding I woke up so excited. It was a glorious day with beautiful blue skies and warm weather. A perfect day for an outdoor wedding. A perfect day for letting all my extended family know I’m a faggot, and a proud one at that.
I snapped a selfie and sent if off to Sir Jace. “Today’s the day, Sir!” I looked great in my locked faggot shirt, khaki pants and black shoes. My silver collar shined in the sunlight, the faggot charm gleaming. I was gonna make a splash.
Sir Jace called me.
“Looking great, faggot. I’m proud of you.”
“Thank you, Sir. I feel great, too!”
“As you should. Ain’t nothing wrong with being yourself. Tell me again, what are you?”
“I’m your faggot, Sir!”
“Yes, I could hear it in your voice, almost like you’re bragging. Good for you!”
“Thank you, Sir. Thank you for showing me the way. I owe it all to you.”
“You do as I say today, and you’ll get your reward. I can promise you that. Don’t forget to FaceTime me later. Just one more thing for you to do and you can suck on my dick all night if you want.”
“Yes Sir”
When I arrived to the venue my sister caught me getting out of the car.
“Oh my God, Richie, what the hell are you wearing? Are you crazy?”
“No, in fact I’ve never felt better. Do you honestly think a faggot like me should be wearing a real man’s suit? That’s just ridiculous.”
“I guess you do have a good point. I’m sure you’re going to be at the top of the gossip list tonight! They’ll get saying, did you see his shirt? What’s that thing on his shirt? Why’s he wearing a faggot charm around his neck? I can hear them now!”
My cock was really, really hurting right then. The idea that I’d be the topic of discussion at so many tables during dinner was a major turn on. What was once utter humiliation has now transformed into pride. I was now turned on by living my truth no matter what.
My sister grabbed my arm and we walked into the wedding chapel and took a seat nearby the family. Aunts, uncles, and cousins alike all looked at me with at first a look of surprise before disdain took over their faces. I could hear whispers and murmuring in my vicinity.
“Oh man, you really got them riled up”, my sister said. My parents were sitting in another section and didn’t see us at first. My mother turned her head to look for us and when she saw me her face drooped and she turned around quickly, clearly upset about my chosen attire.
It’s interesting how polite society is. While everyone there saw my shirt and were whispering amongst themselves, to my face it was business as usual. Funny how that works. I excused myself to FaceTime Sir Jace. He answered quickly.
“Having fun, faggot?”
“Yeah, I guess.”
“Have they served the wedding cake yet?”
“No, not yet.”
“That’s great news. Then there is still time.”
“Time for what, Sir?”
“Great question. There’s still time for you to do this one last task. You want to know what it is? Only one last ask and you can come right over here after that wedding and get as much dick as you need. I know how much you faggots need dick. Right?”
“Tell me, Sir. What do I need to do? I’ll do anything for your cock. Please!”
“Alright. Walk over to the where the band is playing.”
“Now?”
“Of course, now! Do it, come on, move your feet.”
I walked over to where the band was playing.
“Now what, Sir?”
“Grab the mic, and say, “I have an announcement. I’m a faggot!”
“Really? I don’t want to cause a scene, Sir.”
Jace panned the phone to his hard throbbing cock.
“You see this dick here waiting for you? You can have it, like I promised, but only if you do this one last thing.”
“Ohhh damn, Sir. That does look delicious!”
“It does, doesn’t it. Now go make me proud.”
“Alright, alright, Sir. I’ll do it!”
I kept Sir Jace’s FaceTime call active so he could see me walk over to the mic and I interrupted the singer by waving my hand so she paused.
“Ummm, can I borrow the mic for just a second please.”
“Yeah, go ahead.”
I grabbed the mic and held my other hand on my phone so Sir Jace can see and hear it all.
“Excuse me, excuse me. Can I get everyone’s attention please.”
I paused as the room quieted and eyes faced me.
“Thank you. I have an announcement. It’s brief but important. I wanted to let everyone know, I’m Sir Jace’s faggot and I’m proud to serve him. I hope everyone is having a great time tonight. Thanks!”
I handed the mic back to the singer while everyone sat in stunned silence. I walked briskly outside the reception hall.
“Sir, I did it!”
“Yes, you did! Good boy! You made me so proud! How do you feel?”
“I feel liberated, Sir. I feel fucking fantastic!”
“Hey, hey, watch your language now. You see how good it feels to live your truth! I’m so happy for you. Come get your reward. You deserve it, boy!”
“I’ll be right there!”
When I arrived to Sir Jace’s place 30 minutes later, his door was ajar so I slipped inside and locked the door behind me. I slipped off my shoes, socks, and pants but kept on the shirt. I walked over to Jace’s bedroom.
He was kicking back, holding a blunt between his fingertips as he brought it to his mouth. He was watching a replay of the videos I’d sent him earlier and had recorded my speech at the wedding. He took a hit and then his hand patted the mattress.
“Come lay here next to me. I want you to see yourself. Look how you’re glowing. Such a fucking turn on watching my faggot come in to his own and announcing himself so proudly. You should be proud!”
I watched the video and couldn’t believe my eyes. It made my cock leak watching myself outing my faggot status over and over again. Sir Jace watched me, smiling, as I did the same.
“Go on. You worked so hard to get this dick. It’s time you get your reward. I know you need it. It’s like the air that you breathe. Let me see you wrap your pink lips around my big dick.”
I practically creamed myself when my mouth wrapped around Sir Jace’s cock. I had to slow myself down I wanted all of it down my throat.
“Slow down there, faggot. This is not a sprint. My cock is yours for the night. Take it slow. Enjoy it. I’m just gonna sit back here and let you do your thing. Show me what a great cocksucker you are.”
For the next two and a half hours I truly worshipped Sir Jace’s cock. I licked it from base to tip, deep throated, sucked and licked his balls, let him fuck my face. I fagged out fully on his hard cock. I edged Sir Jace several times.
“Fuck, I think I’m ready to blow now. You made my cock feel so good. I love a good faggot that has some skills. You always know how to make me blow.”
Jace held my head down his large hand palming the back of my bald head as he pumped upwards until he grunted and flooded my mouth. So much cum spilling down my chin and each side of my lips. It was a torrent, and I drank it all down.
Sir Jace fell asleep with a wide smile on his face as I slipped back outside and made my way home feeling like a completely different person, or maybe more of an unperson, a faggot. Maybe they’d create a new gender type for those like me, next to “male/female/transgender, they will add, “faggot”. That’s the only gender identity I know right now.
