First Time at the Shack
12:45 am. Tuesday morning. April 1954
It was just as he described it to me, though a little spookier in the dark. I saw the red mailbox that signaled I was at the right farm, even though there was no street light along the highway in front of this house like there was in front of all the others I pasted earlier. As I turned off the road and into the driveway I cut the lights, just like he told me. I guess that was so no one could see my truck entering or me walking around the property so close to the house at this time of night.
I drove my truck past the main house, which was totally dark inside, to the dirt-graveled drive just beyond, then rounded a slight curve. I pulled up in front of a gray out-building around the back of a barn, the one he described as “the shed” and parked close up to the side. I shut off the engine. Left my wallet under my seat. Locked the doors. Left my keys in my right front pocket. Opened the cab door and stepped down onto the gravel below. My boots crunched on the ground with each step, sounding much louder to me than usual. The noise made me look around nervously to see if anyone might be there to hear it. But no, it was just me, in the stillness, in this quiet, pitch dark corner of the property, back behind the house I’d just passed. Only me.
I approached the narrow, longish building. It was quite weathered and in need of some repair. I stepped up to the paint-cracked paneled door and, as I had been told, the door was not locked. It silently glided open into a very dark room. I stepped inside.
What was I doing here again? Oh god. Shit! Who told me about this and why did I come here anyway? And expecting what again?
I stood still for a moment, hoping my eyes would adjust to the darkness. A minute. Two. Then, there it was. A cigarette glowed in the dark about 6, 8 feet away, hard to tell. But it gave me a mark to head toward. As the smoker inhaled deeply, taking a needed drag, I could only see the outline of his head and upper body.
I guess that’s the signal he said I’d get.
The red tip showed me where he was, but as quickly as it flashed, the glow went out. Then I heard a scuff on the floor as he put it out. The smell of the cigarette lingered in the air. I guess he'd been here a while and had smoked a few. But this was the time I was told to be here. I stepped forward slowly, counting my steps, so I could gauge the distance, just in case I needed to get out fast.
Now in front of me, I could see him, his shape outlined, sitting in his chair. He leaned slightly forward, head poised upward a bit. I assumed looking at me, checking me out just as I did him.
“One more step, son, just a little closer,” he rasped, deep and gravely, in this smoke-filled space.
I still couldn't really see anything but I felt it, a hand cupping me. A very large warm hand at that. All of me fit snugly into it. He caressed me softly, pulsing slightly and of course I immediately, without hesitation, or will to do otherwise, responded, quickly expanding out of his hand's capacity. He made a very low pitched hum sound. His approval I guessed. Then grasped me again, a little more firmly this time.
My heart raced and I breathed deeply through my mouth, trying to hold back my nervous excitement but everything that was happening was involuntary. It just was... what? Anticipation? Excitement? Fear?
Oh man, what am I doing?
I heard the “zzzzzt” of my zipper going down. Then two large fingers wedged through the opening in my jeans. I reached down to unsnap them, but my hand was pushed away. A hand that was softer than I expected. The fingers went in and down and explored me. I tried to move up and release my quickly hardening growth but couldn't against the presence of the hand. And there. He squeezed again, around all of me this time.
He's loving the feel of me.
After holding, exploring, and caressing me, I felt the snap at my waist release and my jeans opened fully to him. Both hands went inside, circling around me and down my legs, lowering my jeans as they did. The jean's waist now just below crotch level, he leaned in and sniffed, inhaling deeply and making that low humming sound again. I responded immediately to that hot breath, blown on my crotch, and the vibration I felt from his sounds, shifting myself first up the side of my briefs, then fully straightening, poking out at the top of them.
He took my cloth-covered length between his lips and breathed hot air on me as he slid his mouth up and down. I began to pant heavily again at this entirely new sensation, not sure if I could hold back much longer.
Hearing this shift in me, he hooked his thumbs into the sides of my briefs on each thigh and quickly lowered them releasing me fully. I sprang out and hit, I guess, his face. I heard him chuckle in response. Then his deep hum once more. And then, oh god...
Then I was surrounded by something hot and damp, then something wet went up and down me. I'd never felt anything like that before. I gasped and cried out a little. His big meaty, warm hands grabbed me from behind and pulled my buttocks closer, shoving me deeply down his throat. He squeezed my cheeks and held them firmly while the heat and wetness continued to slide up and down my pulsing shaft.
I exploded loudly – UGH!
Squirt after squirt. Just completely letting go. Almost feeling like I was lifting off the ground in ecstasy I've never known before. I reached out to hold onto something in the blackness so I wouldn't collapse, as my knees gave way.
It was a minute before I realized I was holding onto his head into which I was buried, shooting my seed. The hair was soft and curly. He was bearded, or at least unshaven awhile. My body froze rigid as I released all that was in me, all the pent up.... whatever they were, years and years of fantasies, wonder, and shame. All were dispersed now in the dark. Down this man's willing throat. In the dead of night. In this secret spot. Known only by the few. The man who told me of it said. A way to dissolve the need, when needed. The way to stay intact, whole. A way to release the demon that would destroy everything good in my life if it showed its terrifying, ugly face in the light of day.
Released.
He pulled off. Sat back. Lit another cigarette. This time, on purpose, I could see him, and he, me. I wondered if I'd recognize him from somewhere. I didn't. The lighter's flame was just a flash in our faces. Then gone, as he closed it.
"Beautiful, boy," was all he said, in that gravelly whisper.
I stood still for a moment. I took a deep breath, coming to again. Suddenly, I realized I was half-naked and semi-hard, pointing rigidly down in front of myself. He leaned in quickly and he was able to suck the knob, cleaning off the juices that still dripped there.
Feeling too exposed, I quickly stepped back to pull my jeans and briefs up in one swoop. He reached down to hold on to me again but this was my signal to him that I was done. I couldn't take any more of this. I tucked myself back in and zipped up as he sat back. As he leaned back further into his chair, he took a long drag of his cigarette illuminating us one last time. Not able to look at him, I stared at the floor.
“Thanks,” I whispered, almost inaudibly.
“Come back. You know the code now.”
I nodded, not knowing if he could see that.
And it was done.
Later 1:30 am, driving home
I pulled out onto the highway, turning on my headlights as I rounded the corner. 1:30 am.
My god, what am I doing?
My body still buzzing from the orgasmic high I felt. My limbs tingled. My heart still raced. It hadn't yet slowed because as I drove away it all hit me all over again The guilt. My shame. My sinfulness. The wanton lust I had felt over the last few weeks waiting for my next turn in the shed. My face was red with all these things washing over me. I tried to calm myself as I drove. But I couldn't. It just got worse.
I'm the only one out here. There's no one to see. No one knows I was here. Just him. And he won't tell.
I was the only truck on the road. I knew I would be. No one out this time of night. Not in farm country. They'd all been to bed hours ago and would be up working very soon. I needed to get home before anyone would wake at my place.
The fear, the apprehension, never left me. But I couldn't stop my visits. I couldn't get enough of what I have longed for since... well since forever. I had wanted to know. I needed to know. Now I do and I can't hold it off any longer. I want it. So much. All the time. I couldn't get enough of the adrenaline-fueled high from the shed. Each time, I've lasted longer, took more in, and let him do more, play more, doing new things I'd not thought of, never mind experienced.
How can I stop this? I have to! This is so wrong. I'm so weak.
But even as I thought that I knew I couldn't. Not now. Ever? I don't think so. I have to figure out how to do this without getting caught. Without anyone ever finding out. But how? With everything else in my life? I don't want to hurt anyone. I'm not hurting anyone. Am I? If they knew they'd...
It's just him and me. In there. Doing... He certainly won't tell. He wants it, too. Erik knows though. He does it. At least I guess he does. He told me about the shed in the first place. But... how did he know? When did he start going there? Who told him? Who else knows about it?
And... why did he tell me? Does something show in my face? My eyes? The way I do stuff? Do other men think that about me? No one but Erik has ever said anything to me. What made him say something in the first place? I have to find out!
Shit!
I'm 36 years old. I have a wife and four kids. And a father who relies on me for just about everything too. They all expect me to take care of them, to take care of everything. I have to keep my head down. I have to watch out when I go there. Not too often. No, not more than once a month. That's what I've been doing. It's OK. I'm all right. It'll work out ok. I know it will.
I'm careful. Right? Oh god. No one will know. No one will find out. No one can know. Ever!
Tears came.
I can't cry! I won't cry! I'm the man of the family. I need to be strong. This is too weak. Crying. Oh my god. Dad will know. He'll see it in my face. I have to hide it. Bury it. I can't ever do this again. No matter how it feels. No matter what.
He pulled into the garage next to the barn. Luckily, the driveway came off the road in the opposite direction the house faced. His corner property helped him hide these middle of the night escapades, going out deeper into farm country, to the shed. No one could see him. No one could hear the truck. Not from the house anyway. He knew this. It was this knowledge that gave him the courage to try and sneak out in the middle of the night in the first place. He could keep this a secret from everyone.
Still, he knew there'd always be a chance of discovery. That's why he had limited his ventures out to once a month. So far. But that was so hard to do. Limit himself. He wanted it more. He needed it more. But he couldn't. He knew that. It wasn't safe. The week after each trip to the shed he wished he could turn off that deep yearning he felt, that need in him. But he didn't know how. Not now that it was opened up so deeply in him.
Checking up on him: daylight, 7:20 am
Did he show?
Yeah.
And?
He'll be back.
Good. One more to break in.
It'll take time.
He's hooked though, right?
Yeah. I think so.
Who brought him in?
Erik.
Really?
Yeah. relations of some sort I guess.
(Chuckling) Yeah, aren't we all?
Keep it in the family. It's best that way.
Blood or not. Once in, we're all family.
How many does that make?
Three.
When's the next phase?
Give it a month or two. Got to be sure he comes back at least another time, hopefully, more.
OK. I'll let you know. The usual way.
Off to town now.
Say hello to 'him' for me.
I will.
The Shack, about a month later, midnight. Friday night
He was just getting started when I heard something outside. I pulled away from him and quickly started to pull my jeans back up, when he said, “It's OK. It's safe.”
I wasn't convinced. Fear took hold as the door opened and a tall thin man walked in.
“Don't worry Johnny. It's only me, Erik.” Fuck! My cousin!
That didn't reassure me. What was he doing here? They must have planned it 'cuz it sure seemed like this guy knew who it was and that he'd be coming.
“Come back over here, Johnny.” The man said.
He knew my name. Oh. Yeah. Erik just said it. I turned to look at him, but as usual, it was too dark to see much. It seemed he was still seated, waiting on me to continue what we were up to. But I was having none of this. I started to turn back and walk out, when Erik's arms encircled my shoulder and he said softly, "It's all right Johnny. You know I'm the one who sent you here. You can trust me."
I didn't know what to do. I was scared now. It had been just the two of us. That was hard enough. But Erik's here? God, what will he think? I could feel the red heat of my shame-face. My hands trembled some. But Erik guided me with his arm around me and moved me back to my spot in front of the chair. His grip tightened as my jeans were once again opened. I hadn't had enough time to pull my briefs all the way up so I just flopped out as the man lowered my jeans again. Before I could move or object I was back in his mouth hardening quickly.
“He's good. Isn't he?” It was Erik whispering.
I nodded, not knowing if he could see my response. Erik shuffled a little, though his arm never left my shoulder.
“You like what he does, yeah? Me too.”
I heard fabric rustle. Erik took my hand, the one closest to him, and swung it toward him. I jumped as I felt something, something warm and hard. It was like feeling myself when I did that, at home, in bed, in the dark. But this wasn't mine. This was his. Yet his felt just like mine felt. He wanted me to feel him. Hold it. In my own hand. I've never...
He closed his grip on my hand so he was tighter in my grasp. He sighed loudly saying, “That's right. Hold on to me while he works you. I'll wait my turn.”
I did. I held onto him. Though I had never touched a man like that before. And it was Erik. It felt so weird to hold him while I was hard and pistoning inside another man's mouth. My whole body heated up at the feel of things, the vision in my head, 'cuz it was too dark to see much going on in this room.
Erik again covered my hand and moved it up and down on him. Then he let go. I hesitated, then did what he showed me. I was stroking Erik. Now. Here in the dark. Erik was in my hand. Moving up and down him.
Suddenly I could feel air breezing across my wet cock. It wasn't in his mouth anymore. I heard the chair shift. My hand holding Erik was shoved aside. Then Erik moaned. He was now in the man's mouth, I guessed. Erik reached down, grabbing onto me, and lightly stroked the saliva up and down on mine.
Then there was nothing. Just the slurping sounds and Erik's moans. I just stood there. Nothing. Neither man touching me. It felt weird, there in the dark, almost like I was floating. Then, more rustling. And his mouth was back on me and I hardened again with the attention.
Erik took my hand again, I thought to put himself back in it, but instead, he raised it this time and put it on his chest. It was bare, hot, muscle-hard, a little sweaty, and furry in the middle. He pulled his hand away and I started to lower mine too, but he whispered, “More.” And I reached up to touch and explore his body once more.
I let my hands wander across his chest, running the hair through my fingers. They tripped on his large, erect nipples. He gasped. And I did it again, harder. He hummed his approval. So I stayed and played with one, then the other following his noises as guides to what he liked.
My hand lowered now, waist-high. Then lower still, fingers tangling in his pubic bush. I started to feel the beginning of his hardness, wet with saliva. He pulled his mouth off a bit, giving his attention to Erik's crown. So I reached further down to hold him, grasping all around him, and the mouth came back, sucking the cock I held, as I aimed it now into his mouth.
I didn't stop. I didn't want to stop. My curiosity was up. So with my other hand, I raised my arm to Erik's shoulder. He leaned toward me pressing the entire side of his body against mine. He turned his head and whispered in my ear, “Get naked. Like me.” So I did.
Stepping back one step, I pulled off my t-shirt, dropping it on the floor. I kicked off my boots, leaving them in place, then stepped out of my jeans pulling them off my now bare feet. The cool air of the shed wafted over my sweaty body. I stepped back next to Erik pulling up next to his taller body. He reached for me too and, naked, we held each other side to side. He turned to me and kissed my cheek as the man shifted back to me and turned his attention back to me. I instantly hardened with his hot wetness and warm sucking.
Erik let go of me. My side felt cool without him right there. But the absence was brief. He was behind me now. I began to feel his hands run across my shoulders, down my back, and around to my chest. He pulled my body close to his, cupping my pecs. I sighed and leaned back against him. I was taken a little by surprise when I felt his hardness against me. I flinched. But before I could pull away, he pressed me closer to him, and settled in, there, between my buttocks. His heat blazed against me there.
The man in front had pulled off me and was now slightly below me licking, sucking, nibbling on my testicles, every so often going back and licking me up and down and then returning below. Everything began to swirl around me. I had never had such sensations over my entire body all at once. Erik's hand grasped my forehead and pulled me back to him, turning my face toward his as he did so. Then...
He kissed me. Lightly. Then deeper. More passionately. More so than I have ever been kissed. I wanted to explode then and there. But the other man had pulled off me and held me almost too tightly, so I wouldn't spend just yet.
Then Erik slid up and down my back rubbing against me first, with his muscled body wet with sweat, then his cock still moist with saliva. I started to pant more and more quickly. Fear rose in me. I wasn't sure what was coming next.
What's he going to do?
But then he stopped. He was no longer holding me. And the man took me back into his mouth to please me once more.
There was a push now, Erik's hand pressing against my shoulders, shoving me firmly, forward and down. I wasn't sure what he wanted. I couldn't very well just lean my whole body forward with the man on his knees in front of me, so I bent at the waist. "Yes," Erik whispered. The pressure on my back stopped, but I stayed bent that way resting my hands on the man's head.
Then I felt it. Something new. A different kind of sensation. It made me shiver at first. Then I realized what it was. Erik's tongue was licking my muscled cheeks. He nibbled them gently, making me shiver again. Next, he gripped my glut muscles on each side tightly in his hands, shaking them slightly, squeezing, hard. Then pulling them apart, I felt it, again. Another new feeling. Weirdly pleasurable. Just a tad at first, I didn't know what it could be. Then more deliberately. He was licking down the center of these two cheeks. The deep cavern between them whetted and slippery from his attention.
Nothing. Nothing ever felt like that. I quivered all over and hearing my pleasure, he increased his attention to that most private part of me. All while I was slathered by the man in front. I could hold on no longer and gasped sharply for more air. The sound I heard next was nothing like I've ever heard. I was so frightened as to what it might be until I realized it was coming from my own mouth. A deep unearthly groan so loud and unabashed it felt like it came from deep down in my inner core, out of every pore of my body. I was lifting off in ecstasy as my body exploded in an orgasm that I never knew I could experience, ejaculating with more power and force than I ever have before.
Erik held onto me tightly as I leaned back against him, needing the sturdiness of his body to keep from falling. He put my hand on him and the heat he radiated as he too exploded almost burned my hand. He turned, quieting my groaning with his mouth over mine kissing me until I was totally silent, and spent. Though there was nothing left, the man's mouth did not leave me. He licked and sucked my now ultra-sensitive softening penis. Every time his tongue ran over my crown I hollered and twitched sharply at the extreme sensitivity.
“Please... Please let it go.” And I slid out of his mouth into the cool shed air.
I broke away from Erik and the man. I couldn't be near anyone for a moment or two. Erik reached out for me but I pushed his hands away. I could feel my clothes at my feet. I picked them up and ran to the door. I knew no one was around, after all my visits here. I put my clothes back on in the outside darkness, as fast as I could.
As I lowered my t-shirt over my head, I saw that the door had opened. Out walked Erik. He stood there for a moment. Naked. Sweat glistening in the starlit night sky. Slowly, He walked toward me. I stood absolutely still not even moving to lower the rest of my shirt.
“It's alright Johnny.”
He came closer and I put up my hands.
“Stop.”
“Johnny, talk to me.”
“I'm OK. I just need to leave now. Gotta get home.”
“It was good for you. I know it was. I could tell you thought so. Didn't you?”
"Bye Erik." I got into my truck, backed up, and drove away. Home soon.
God, what am I doing?
