Leaf watched his mom navigate through the small town of Enterprise, as he and his dad followed. Jude, his younger brother, was riding with her, and on a trailer being towed behind them, his Honda Civic was strapped down. It had been a long two days, the drive from Boulder, Colorado to the rural community south of Enterprise, Alabama, but it was a move his parents had been planning for three years. They loved Boulder, but it was so expensive to live in the city, and Leo and Maya wanted a small farm. They wanted to grow vegetables, have fruit trees, raise chickens for eggs, maybe even get some goats to make cheese. A sustainable operation to put into effect all the things they had read about and believed important.
Leo’s grandparents had been hippies back in their day, and his parents, although not as carefree, still held to the environmentalism and healthy life promoted by their parents. It instilled in him a desire to live on the land, and after nineteen years at the tech company, he had taken early retirement to pursue Maya’s and his dream.
Maya was a child of a Native American father and mother descended from German immigrants of the mid-twentieth century. She grew up on a farm in Kansas and hated the corporate aspects of it with the heavy chemical use, from fertilizers to pesticides. But she had loved growing up on a farm and always wanted her two children to have the same opportunity.
Leaf knew Jude was excited about their move, looked forward to a new school in the fall, making new friends, and being closer to a coastline, the Gulf of Mexico less than 2 hours away. Jude had seen the Pacific coast during two vacations, one to California and one to Washington, and after seeing images of the Gulf Coast with its white sandy beaches, he couldn’t wait for the opportunity to visit.
Leaf was torn, wondering if life would be any better in rural Alabama than in Boulder, having serious doubts it would. He was gay and being introverted, struggled with meeting other boys. His parents had supported him, encouraged him to date, telling him to not feel pressured to do anything he didn’t want to do. He loved them for their support, and knew they were right. But it was easier said than done. Or so he told himself.
He had read stories about Alabama, the intolerance of some, but within the far too typical stories, there were some that spoke of a tolerance by some communities, places where families had been a part of it for generations. Men who talked of acceptance, a live and let live attitude missing in far too many places. Leaf hoped the place they were going would give him such a place, a place he could call home. A place where he might finally meet another boy.
“What are you thinking?” said Leo, looking over at Leaf.
Leaf turned from watching the new terrain pass by to his father and smiled. “Just noticing how different the land is; it is so green.”
“It is that. I know having only two more years of school makes this move seem unfair—”
“It’s not. I mean, yeah, I’ll miss my friends, but I’m looking forward to a new school.”
“I bet not as much as Jude.”
“No,” Leaf replied, smiling at his father. “But I think it could be nice.”
“I just worry it might not be as tolerant as Boulder.”
“I’ve thought of about that, but I’ve read some places are not that bad.”
“I hope this is one of them. You’ll tell us if you have any problems at school, right?”
“Yes, I’ll tell you.”
Coming out of Enterprise, they took Plaza Drive, heading southeast. Maya in her Camry Hybrid followed by Leo in his Rivian R1T, a guilty purchase last December after getting his bonus. Leo had wondered how hard it would be to rid the farm of combustion engines, not have any vehicles or tractors that used fuel, but he knew the reality was far different. There would have to be some combustion engines, at least in the tractors, but Maya and he had resolved to reduce their footprint as much as possible. They were even meeting someone with the power company about solar panels for the house and smaller barn next week.
After almost two miles, the Freeman convoy turned on 82, heading further to the southeast for about a mile, then turned back to the north on Matthew Donoghue Road, a narrow county road that cut past a farm, through a stand of pine of both side of the road, then curved upon another farm.
“This is the Coleman place,” said Leo.
“Our new neighbors?”
“Yep. They seem nice but I’m not sure how progressive they might be.”
“So, watch what I say.”
“Just be nice and polite and we’ll see how they respond to us.”
“To the tree huggers from Boulder.”
Leo laughed uncomfortably at Leaf’s joke, knowing that was probably how some would view them with all the negative connotations derisively created by the conservatives.
Leaf looked at the farm that would be next to them. On the opposite side of the road sat an old farmhouse that had been expanded and renovated over the years. It was painted white and sat in a large yard. Behind it, a detached garage perpendicular to the house letting the drive extend straight back to a large barn. A field was behind the barn and along the side of the yard a stream fed into a small pond. On the other side of the pond, there is another field in cultivation. On their side of the road, the Colemans had another barn set not far from the road. To its left side and behind it a large pasture with cows grazing. Back by the road to the right of the drive and barn, a vegetable garden with tomato plants in wire cages and something growing along fencing stretched between a few posts, and a host of other plants growing in neat rows.
“Our place starts at their fence line and goes down to those pine trees,” said Leo, pointing at the horizon to the north.
Leaf looked at how the stream meandered among some trees on their property until it crossed under the highway and into the Coleman’s pond. Just to the north of the woods, a 1970s era brick ranch house. Maya turned into the drive and Leo followed, easing off the road careful to keep the trailer within the narrow gravel drive.
Leaf looked at what was now home. The house to the left of the drive, and to the right a small barn. A small field sat to the right of the barn. Looking straight back along the gravel drive, sat a large barn, an old wood framed structure with weathered siding and a tin roof.
“It’s bigger than I thought,” said Leaf.
“What’s bigger?”
“The main barn.”
“Yes, it is a nice old barn. I’m thinking of making a studio in part of it.”
“That would be nice,” said Leaf, knowing his mother wanted an artist studio.
“The small barn will be our main working barn for vegetable crops for we’ll start in the field behind it with our first crops this fall.”
“Fall?”
“Yes. We can grow carrots, garlic, spinach, turnips, onions, and a host of other crops.”
Leo pulled past the garage and stopped in the gravel drive as Maya pulled into the garage.
“We’re home.”
“And with no furniture to sit on and no beds to sleep in,” joked Leaf.
“Patience. The moving van will be here tomorrow before noon.”
The Freemans hung the clothes they had packed, laid out sleeping bags and blankets on the floor, and gathered in the empty kitchen.
“We’ll go back to Enterprise for dinner, check out the town, then come back to turn in early, for tomorrow will be a long day,” said Maya as she looked at Leo, Leaf, and Jude standing on the opposite side of the island.
The doorbell chimed and they all looked toward the front of the house.
“I wonder who that could be,” said Maya.
“I’ll go find out,” said Leaf.
He went through the double swinging door into the dining room and crossed the living room to the foyer. Through the windows he saw a silver Ford Explorer sitting in the drive where the sidewalk ended. He swung the front door open to a woman holding a pie dish.
“Hello, I’m Anna Coleman, your neighbor from just across the street.”
“Yes, dad told me about you. I’m Leaf. Would you like to come in?”
“No, no, I realize you’re just getting here and probably tired after a long drive. I just wanted to drop this off,” holding out the pie dish. “It’s blackberry. They are so nice and big this year.”
“Wow, thanks,” Leaf replied taking the pie.
“Don’t rush to get the pie dish back to me, for I know the next few days will be very busy with your getting moving in.”
“Thank you, Ms. Coleman.”
“You’re welcome. By the way, how old are you, if you don’t mind me asking.”
“I’m sixteen.”
“So, you’re a junior in high school?”
“Yes, that is correct.”
“Well…my son is nineteen and…”
Anna didn’t finish, let an uncomfortable silence build until she shook her head. “Shelton lives at home and works with his dad on the farm, and I’m afraid he is a bit of a loner. Hopefully you two will hit it off.”
“I’m sure we will,” said Leaf, knowing they may not. “Is he an only child?”
“No, there is Hannah, but she’s married and living down in Tallahassee.”
“I see.”
“You have a brother, right?”
“Yes, Jude, who is fourteen and starting ninth grade.”
“So, you’re the oldest. Well, welcome to Enterprise, or I should say, south of it,” said Anna, smiling up at Leaf. “I need to get home to finish dinner. Once you get settled in, we’ll have you over for dinner. Maybe do a cookout or something.”
“That sounds very nice.”
Leaf watched as Anna walked back to her Explorer and once she was behind the wheel and engine running, he closed the door and went back to the kitchen, the still warm pie in hand.
Leaf had walked through the two barns with Jude and his dad, listening to the plans for how to layout each for their operations and what equipment they would be buying over the next few days. They had been in the new house only a week, but it felt like much longer.
Their furniture and belongings arrived the next day after their arrival. For two days they placed furniture, set up beds, hung artwork and photographs on the walls, and set up their own bedrooms. Jude mowed the yard with the new mower, and Leaf helped his dad repair the fence around the three plots, one to the left of the main barn that would be for chickens, adding chicken wire over the existing fencing, and the main plot behind the barn and the smaller on to the other side that run back toward the road behind the smaller barn. The latter would be their main vegetable garden for the fall, and the one behind the barn laid by for winter, prepping for next spring.
After a week they got settled in, and Leaf was glad to have a day to himself. Jude had gone with their parents to Dothan to look at tractors and the implements to go with it. He was going to get his bicycle out and go for a ride, but instead he found himself roaming the woods along the small stream. The previous owner had kept them thinned out; stumps of smaller trees evident all through the area.
He followed the meandering path of the stream until at the back of their property where he stared into the thicker woods behind them. He wondered where the stream originated, knowing it had to be springs for there was one on their property, a place where the water just seeped out of the ground forming a small pool then flowed down to the stream adding more water to it.
Eventually, Leaf found himself making his way along the fence that delineated the property line between them and the Colemans. He looked across the pasture seeing the cows and one lone donkey grazing across it. Didn’t the cows get bored, and what about that donkey. Didn’t it get lonely? Or were they even aware of such emotions?
Because of the way the land sloped, the back section was the lowest elevation and the highest was about the middle of the pasture, looking toward the front only the roof of the Coleman’s barn was visible. Leaf leaned on a fence post and stared at the donkey, the odd one out. He watched it flick its tail, then raise its head and shake it before leaning back to the grass to graze. The donkey looked up, as did the cows, all looking toward the front. Then they began to move, and Leaf turned in time to see an old Ford truck crest the hill towing a trailer. There was hay piled on it.
The driver eased across the pasture following the ruts that went down the middle of the pasture. It stopped short of the approaching cows and donkey and the driver climbed out. Shirtless, it was a young man, and Leaf knew it had to be the Coleman’s son. Leaf struggled to remember his name as he watched him move to the trailer and climb on it. Shelly. Shay. Sherman. No.
Shelton.
Leaf finally remembered as he stared at the body, the tanned skin tone glistening in the bright sunlight. The body was already sweaty, probably some chore at the barn before coming back to feed the cows. He couldn’t make out Shelton clearly because of the distance. He could see the hair was a dirty blonde and the body looked lean, long limbed. Shelton was wearing jeans that fit low on the waist and despite the distance, Leaf could see the ass was round filling out the seat of the jeans enticingly.
A real country boy, not like him who moved from a small city whose parents were just starting to set up a small vegetable farm. What was Shelton like? Was he a rowdy redneck who disparaged the gays? Did he chew tobacco and drink beer with the guys at some bar in Enterprise or over in Dothan? Did he have a girlfriend? Did they have sex?
Was Shelton straight?
Leaf realized he was staring and if Shelton looked over, he would be seen. He slowly backed away from the fence and slipped around a tree, an old oak whose trunk was large enough to conceal him. He continued to watch, looking at the way the arms worked a pitchfork tossing hay to the ground where the cows gathered around. After the trailer was emptied of its load, Leaf watched Shelton stand up straight and wipe his brow with a forearm.
Shelton was soon back into the old Ford and maneuvering away from the cows then making a wide turn to head back toward the barn, and Leaf watched until the truck disappeared over the rise.
Leaf climbed out of the back seat and came up beside Jude as they followed their parents up to the front door of the Coleman’s. Buddy Coleman had stopped by to invite them over to dinner, then spent over an hour helping Leo get the planter hooked to the tractor and set up for planting. Leaf had seen how Buddy Coleman fell in with his dad, unassuming and talkative about farming, someone who loved the life. Approaching the two-story farmhouse with its full width porch it looked like the perfect home for a farm family. There was a swing at one end and a group of rocking chairs between it and the front door, all painted white like the house.
Leo came to the front door first and rang the doorbell as the rest of them came up behind him. It seemed to take a long time, but the door finally swung open to reveal Buddy.
“Hey, come on in. I should have told you to come around to the back for that is where we stay.”
“We’ll remember for next time,” said Maya as they came into the house. A formal living room and through a cased opening a formal dining table, two rooms that appeared to be rarely used. They followed Buddy down a wide hall, pass a stair, and into a large family room with an open kitchen to the side. Anna was stirring around in the kitchen and through the rear windows they could see a deck with a grill set up to cook.
“Y’all come on in,” said Anna. “Grab a seat.”
“Anything I can do to help,” asked Maya.
“No, no, just come sit over here and keep me company. Buddy, you and Leo go get the steaks cooked. Boys, Shelton should be down shortly. He came in late and is up in his room getting cleaned up.”
Leaf followed Jude to the large sectional sofa that took up most of the family room and sat down. A lounge chair sat on the window wall side of the seating area with a large coffee table anchoring the center of the space. A baseball game was on the television with the volume turned down low and they watched it for lack of anything better to do.
Leaf listened more to Anna and his mom talk than to the game. Of the school and what it had been like for Hannah and Shelton, the town and best grocery store to shop at, and what Dothan was like. Through the windows he watched as Buddy and his dad talked while Buddy put steaks on the hot grill. Then he noticed the framed photographs on the side tables. One of Anna and Buddy in the mountains. One was an older woman sitting under a tree and he assumed she was Anna or Buddy’s mother. Then he saw one of a young man and teenage girl. The girl had Buddy’s dark hair and features that were the feminine version of Buddy. The boy had his mother’s features, including dirty blonde hair. It had to be Shelton and his sister, and he stared at the cute kid with his gapped tooth smile and dark brown eyes and skin tone darker than his sister.
“There you are, come on in and introduce yourself,” said Anna.
Leaf looked around and saw Shelton standing at the doorway. A blue plaid shirt and jeans on a lean body, then there was hair, thick and straight, looking like all Shelton had done was dry it with a towel not bothering to comb it out. Then he noticed the hesitation, a shyness that surprised him. He expected Shelton to be outgoing, a bit rowdy, but instead he saw someone introverted.
“Hey, I’m Shelton.” The voice was low, almost too low to hear.
“I’m Jude and this is my brother Leaf.”
Jude was always the first to speak, more outgoing and friendly, and Leaf shook his head at being outdone again. “Hey,” he said.
Shelton came around the sofa and sat in the lounge chair.
For a few minutes there was an awkward silence between them. Jude looked over at Leaf shrugging his shoulders. Leaf knew one of them had to be the first to speak.
“Can you tell us what the high school is like?”
Shelton smiled, shaking his head, then looked around. “It’s okay. It has the usual cliques and a couple of teachers are a pain in the ass.”
“Shelton…language,” said Anna from the kitchen.
“Sorry, mom,” Shelton replied, then looked at Leaf,” you a senior?”
“No, a junior.”
“Watch out for the American History teacher, Mr. Roberts. He likes to give pop quizzes and makes you remember a lot of dates.”
“Thanks for the heads up.”
“I’m in the eighth grade,” said Jude.
“Eighth grade was easy. All the teachers are good, although I heard there is a new math teacher,” said Shelton.
“When did you finish school?”
“Two years ago.”
“And you farm with your dad,” said Leaf, jumping in before Jude could ask.
“Yes.”
“Okay guys let’s get ready to eat,” said Buddy coming in with a platter of cooked steaks.
“We’ll prepare our plates in here and go to the dining room to eat,” said Anna.
Everyone seated, Leaf found himself right across from Shelton. Every time he looked up there were brown eyes staring back only to look away. Leaf couldn’t help it, he sized up Shelton once again. The nice skin tone. The attractive face. The tousled dirty blonde hair. Anna had pushed it out of his eyes after they sat down but it was back over the forehead hanging in the eyes. Shelton had left the top two buttons of his shirt undone, and Leaf looked at the smooth tanned skin, and some silver necklace around the slightly long neck. He wondered what hung from it. A cross, like most others, or some other items. Maybe an arrowhead or something influenced by fantasy or science fiction. As their parents talked, Leaf would look to who was speaking, then back to Shelton.
Shelton was nineteen, two years older, and with him still in school he knew Shelton viewed him as still a kid. He could see it in the eyes, how they looked at him. It frustrated him. He wanted to get to know Shelton. What kind of person was he, wondering if he found out, would he still feel attracted to him, or would he find out Shelton was the kind of person that would hurt him or disparage him if given a chance.
Shelton barely spoke during dinner, instead letting their parents do most of the talking. For Leaf, he didn’t know what to say that would seem important. He knew little about farming and to discuss the one thing that was really important to him was something that would ruin the night for his parents. He knew far too many people didn’t want to hear about some teenager being gay and all the problems associated with being different from most other boys his age. He knew without being told not to bring it up.
But seeing the looks Shelton gave him from time to time, he wondered if Shelton could see it. Had somehow figured out he was gay and was judging him.
Leaf pulled out onto Boll Weevil Circle, the loop road around Enterprise, still chuckling at the name. He was leaving a garden center after picking up seed for his parents. He shifted through the gears of the Si to get to speed, heading back around contemplating where to grab lunch. On the way to the garden center, he had passed every fast-food joint he knew of and a couple he didn’t. On the way back, he passed back by a few until coming up on the one with the service to your car and decided to try it. He pulled off the four-lane and around behind the drive-in to the drive at the back of the property. Circling to the right, he pulled along the parking stalls with menu boards and a canopy running overhead until he came to an empty space between a Hyundai and Tahoe.
Someone took his order, then he turned the stereo back up for Artic Monkeys were coming on. As he waited the Tahoe stared up and pulled out. In less than a minute an old Ford truck pulled in. It sat high on a four-wheel drive suspension and was white over turquoise and looked clean. Someone came over the speaker at the truck asking for the driver’s order. The driver gave his order and Leaf sat up as if it made listening easier. It sounded like Shelton. It had to be. He cussed the menu board being so large it blocked his view. He was tempted to get out and walk over to see if he was right, and if so, say hello. It would not be out of the ordinary, not for most people. But for him there were ulterior motives, so he sat listening to the radio in the truck come back up loud enough to hear it was on some old rock station.
A young girl, about his own age, came out with his order. He ate while listening to the radio, constantly looking over to the side of the truck next to him, wishing Shelton would go to the bathroom or just out to stretch his legs so he could see if it really was him. When he finished, he put the wrappers in the bag and eased out of his car, careful not to bang the door into the menu board. There was a trash can to his left, but he pretended not to see it and turned right, going to one a few cars over. He passed the Ford truck forcing himself not to look. He would look on the way back.
Trash pushed through the flap; Leaf turned to go back to his car. As he came close to the truck, he saw Shelton look up and recognize him, giving him a small wave with the hand on the steering wheel. Leaf slipped between the menu board and the truck coming up to the window.
“Hey, your mom didn’t make you lunch?”
“No, she’s gone to Dothan to shop,” said Shelton. “What about you?”
“I went to this garden center for more seed and decided to stop on the way back.”
Shelton nodded but didn’t reply and Leaf felt like he was supposed to leave. But then he looked at the truck again, seeing it was old, really old, but in good condition.
“Is this your truck?”
“Yes. I got it from my grandfather. He got it from his dad.”
“Did you put the lift on it?”
“It came this way. A High Boy, a 73 model.”
“It’s nice.”
“Thanks. Is that your car?”
“Yes. My folks bought it for me last Christmas. It’s a 2020—”
“Si; I saw the badge. But I thought you were going to be a junior?”
“I am.”
“And your parents let you drive with a learner’s permit.”
“I’m sixteen. My birthday is late in the year, so I’m basically a year behind most my age. I’ll turn seventeen in November.”
“Oh, I see. I knew someone like that in my class. It seemed unfair she was the first to get a license, until I realized most her age were a year ahead.”
“I try not to think of it. Dad keeps saying when I’m out of school none of it will matter.”
Then an awkward silence. Shelton looked down, then back up to Leaf.
“You—”
“Excuse me, I have his order,” came a voice from behind Leaf and he turned to see the girl with Shelton’s food. She had interrupted Shelton and it aggravated Leaf, but he stepped back and let her hand Shelton his food.
“Hey, I should go and let you eat.”
“Okay.”
As he backed up, Leaf wondered what Shelton was going to say. He wanted to ask but for had let it go as he moved around to his car. There would be other times to talk to him for he was just across the road.
As summer came to an end, Leaf prepared for the start of school. He went shopping for new clothes, helped on the farm, hoeing rows to cut out the weeds and thinning carrots to give remaining plants room to grow decent roots, rode his bicycle learning the surrounding countryside and downtown Enterprise, and he stood behind a tree and watched Shelton feed the cows or work in their garden, or stirring around their barn. He watched the older boy working on their farm. Even coming back from a bicycle ride, he got to see Shelton mowing the ditch and shoulder of the road along their property. And every time, no matter the task, Shelton was shirtless, revealing the upper body.
And the image was burned in Leaf’s mind. A body that wasn’t perfect with a big muscular build, but a lean build, the chest and stomach flat and lean, and obviously with the hard labors of their farm, contained a larger strength and stamina than some with more muscular builds. Leaf pictured the smooth skin, glistening in the hot sun from the sweat covering the body. The attractive face always half hidden from view, either from the dirty blonde hair hanging down into the eyes or a ballcap low on the head putting the face in shadow.
Once school started, Leaf was finally distracted enough not to constantly think of him. For there was the senior, Tyler, who was a football player with a tall muscular body and black wavy hair and blue eyes and a wicked smile that made him aware of staring far too often. In his class there was Allan. About five foot four and a baby face and reddish-brown hair and the roundest ass he had ever seen. And green eyes that looked like emeralds. There was also Logan who was about his own height, about five foot eleven, with a muscular build, biceps impossibly large and a cock that the tight jeans Logan wore did nothing to conceal, the tube of flesh often stretched down the right thigh. There was talk among the others about how large Logan was, girls giggling with mention of it and boys obviously in awe of it. For Leaf, he wondered what it would be like to suck it and get fucked by it.
The other boy in his class he desired was Charlie. A bit shorter than his five foot eleven with an average build and he had to wear glasses which never seemed to fit right. But he was personable, playful, and Leaf found himself desiring him, then finding himself another of Charlie’s many friends.
But Shelton was always in the periphery, just across the fence or across the dining table when their families dined together. And the unfinished statement hung between them, Leaf thinking of it far too often, knowing it had become an obsession. When they crossed paths, Shelton was friendly enough but never invited Leaf to do something with him, like go grab a burger or go to a movie or just hang out. But then again, he didn’t invite him over to play video games or to ride bicycles (did Shelton own a bicycle?) or just hang out and watch television. He imagined it, Shelton laying across his bed as they played video games or watched television, then of their feet bumping, of legs pressed together, then lips and naked bodies…
Shelton was never far from his thoughts.
The next summer found Leaf and Jude busy, helping with the farm. Leaf hauled produce to famer’s markets, one manned by his mom and Jude and one manned by his dad. They picked and shelled and snapped and washed late into the afternoon, rose early to weed and trim, and in the afternoon, start all over. The summer passed quickly, everyone keeping busy, then the day came when Leaf entered his senior year, seventeen, soon to be eighteen come November the fourth.
As he walked up the sidewalk to enter the red brick building with its metal roof, he realized he had not seen Shelton for over a month. The Coleman’s went on a vacation, first to see Hannah, then to the mountains of Tennessee, being gone for over two weeks. Buddy’s uncle took care of the cows and that one lone donkey, and a group of women were in the Coleman’s garden three or four times a week during their vacation. When the Colemans got home they were busy getting caught up around the farm.
He wondered if Shelton realized it, or if he even cared.
November the fourth landed on a Saturday, and all morning Leaf watched his mom prepare for a birthday party in celebration of him turning eighteen. Gifts had arrived from grandparents and a few friends back in Boulder, all arranged on a card table on the back patio where the grill and two more tables were set up. Out in the field behind the main barn, wood was stacked for a bonfire with camp chairs and cut wood set around to sit on. It was warmer than usual, but everyone knew once it got dark the temperature would drop, so they wore long sleeve shirts and jeans, with jackets or sweaters set out if needed.
Just before five, Anna Coleman arrived to help, bringing a large dish of baked beans. She quickly went to work in the kitchen helping his mom.
“Leaf, Shelton should be here soon,” said Anna as she slid the baked beans into the warm oven.
Over the next thirty minutes, others arrived. Charlie, Amy, and Nancy arrived in Amy’s Jeep. Other classmates followed and they were soon sitting around the patio talking about school or gossiping about classmates. The last arrive was Shelton in a white dress shirt and nice jeans carrying a gift.
“You made it,” said Leaf trying not to let his concern Shelton was going to blow off his party show.
“Sorry I’m late, but mom said I better not show up in ratty jeans or a worn-out T-shirt.”
Shelton smiled, trying to play it off for how he was dressed.
“Well, you look nicer than the rest of us,” Leaf replied trying to sound playful. He turned to see his friends looking at them. “Hey guys, you know Shelton Coleman, right?”
“Yes,” said Rachel, one of his classmates, and it was obvious she was attracted to Shelton.
Looking around at the other girls, Leaf wondered how many were attracted to him, and which one would gain his attention.
Despite his best efforts, Leaf couldn’t get Shelton to join in with the others as they played horseshoes, or some silly game Amy brought to the party. But he was always at the periphery, not far away. The girls grew bolder in their flirting with him and Leaf noticed how it made Shelton pull away, stand back further from the center of the group.
Once the bonfire was lit and its flames illuminated the space around it, everyone found a place to sit. Leaf noticed to his right and to his left, there was the natural pairing of boy/girl, boy/girl, and he wondered about the other side of the bonfire where he couldn’t see. Was it the same all the way around the circle, except for him? Did Shelton finally respond to one of the girls, sitting with her somewhere on the other side. Flames rose high into the night sky and heat radiated outward, knocking back the chill of the night. The moon hovered just above the trees along the stream, and Leaf felt something special in the air. All the day’s flirting and looks between the others culminating in them pairing up, whispering amongst themselves with a few stealing quick kisses.
It was his birthday, his day to feel special, but sitting at the edge of the light, Leaf felt alone. Not really part of the group. He wondered about coming out to everyone, just put it out there and see what happened. He had come out to Nancy and Amy, then later Charlie too. His fear was not realized as each one accepted him unconditionally. Charlie was last to be told but was the one person he confided in the most. Even that night before the lighting of the bonfire, they had stood away from the others and talked about how he wished there was someone in his life, someone to go out on dates, dinner and movies and trips to a park or just hanging out on a rainy Saturday afternoon.
Leaf, I know it’s gotta be tough. I don’t know anyone else around here who is gay, so I don’t know who you could even ask out.
Leaf had replayed their conversation over in his mind, and it frustrated him to think of it. Sitting by the bonfire looking at the coupling of others, he was even more frustrated than before. He got up and headed to the barn.
“Hey, where are you going?” said Charlie.
“To get something to drink.”
Leaf didn’t look back or take notice of how those on the other side of the bonfire were coupled. He looked toward the barn and walked straight toward it. One light was on inside, a bare bulb hanging over the table set up with the last of the snack foods. On the floor to one side, a cooler with the drinks. He opened it to see most of the ice had melted but the water the remaining drinks sat in was cold, and he quickly grabbed a bottle of water. He walked toward the front of the barn while twisting off the cap and taking a drink. He stood just inside the open double doors looking toward the house, the patio and rooms along the back all lit up. It was still strange to call it home, even with his Civic sitting by the garage.
There were months of school left and he didn’t know how he was going to endure it. The holidays, the dance in January, then Valentine’s Day, and finally the prom. He knew what was going to happen. What happened with most gay boys still in the closet in some small town. They skipped most of it or went alone.
“Why are you in here?”
It startled Leaf to hear Shelton’s voice behind him, and he froze, unable to look back.
“Are you not enjoying your party?”
Leaf finally turned and saw the dark silhouette of Shelton behind him. What could he say that would make sense to him. He turned back around and stared across the backyard not focusing on anything.
“Leaf…are you gay?”
It took his breath away and he felt his heart race in his chest. He couldn’t turn around for he knew Shelton was closer than before. He sensed him, so damn close. But it was a question he couldn’t let alone, not now that Shelton had asked.
“Yes,” Leaf replied, then when Shelton had not said anything, he took a deep breath and continued. “How did you find out?”
“I…I overheard Charlie and you talking earlier.”
“So now you view me differently. Someone who is not what they originally appeared. Do you hate me now?”
“No,” said Shelton in such a low voice Leaf barely heard it.
“You won’t tell anyone will you?”
“No.” Again, barely a whisper.
Leaf felt tears trickling down his cheeks making him realize he really was crying. He wiped them with his hands and tried to stop.
“Don’t cry.”
“I can’t help it. I don’t know whether to stay closeted or come out to everyone. I don’t know if I could endure it if things went bad like being ostracized in my final year of high school. Or if you suddenly hated me and avoided me from now on.”
“I won’t…I don’t hate you.”
Leaf suddenly turned and found Shelton standing not four feet away. “But can you accept me?”
“Yes.” Again, a whisper when Leaf thought Shelton should be yelling. It was irrational, he knew, but it felt intimate, and he didn’t want to be wrong about it.
“Do you have any idea what I’m feeling right now?”
Shelton stepped closer, close enough he was no longer a simple silhouette. Leaf could see the eyes staring at him. “Yes, I know.”
Leaf looked at Shelton, seeing him in a new light. The shyness suddenly made sense. The lack of close friends and keeping himself busy on the farm, not allowing time for their absence to be noticeable.
“Are you…gay, too?”
The question hung between them, then Shelton looked up and sighed.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to imply you’re gay,” Leaf stammered when Shelton failed to respond right away.
“Yes.”
“I guess I just wanted someone to be like me. You know, someone I could relate to.”
“Yes.”
“It would just be nice to have someone to hang out with that I could talk to, about how it is so different for me.”
“Leaf.”
“Shelton?”
“Yes. I’m gay too.”
Shelton moved to Leaf, held his face between calloused hands and kissed him.
Leaf was shocked at first, then he kissed back. First, lips against lips, then he let Shelton’s tongue slip into his mouth as he moved his hands to the narrow waist. He pulled Shelton closer until their bodies pressed together. Shelton pushed against him, pumped crotch against crotch, and Leaf felt his cock start to harden.
“Hey Leaf, is there any more ice?” someone yelled from just outside the barn.
Shelton jumped back gasping for breath and Leaf wiped his mouth and straightened his shirt looking toward the back to see if they were coming into the barn. Nancy strolled in, cup in hand, and looked across the barn. She waved her cup.
“Is there any ice out here?”
“Look in the second cooler. If there is any left it’ll be in it,” said Leaf.
Leaf and Shelton watched Nancy scooped out some ice with her hand, then go over to the table and refill the cup with soda. She took a sip then looked back.
“Are you guys coming back out?”
“Yes,” Leaf and Shelton said in unison.
Nancy strolled out and they saw her silhouette heading toward the burned down bonfire, only the largest limbs still burning.
Leaf watched her go back to where she was sitting next to Allen, dropping down into the camp chair. When he turned to Shelton, he saw the worried look change into a smile, then they both started laughing.
“That was close,” said Shelton.
“Yes, it was,” said Leaf, then he looked back toward the bonfire and everyone sitting around it. “But what if she had seen us. Would you have been okay with it?”
“I don’t know. I mean…I want to, but…”
The unfinished sentence hung between them saying so much about their insecurity being gay.
“Let’s go back,” said Leaf thinking their little making out session was over, wondering if Shelton would pull away from him now.
They were halfway across the barn when Shelton slipped up next to him matching his slow pace.
“You want to get together tomorrow? We could go to this place downtown, or the seafood place off Ross Clark on the south side of town. Or we could go to Dothan,” said Shelton.
“I’d like that,” said Leaf looking over and seeing Shelton smile, realizing it was something he had rarely seen.
Shelton navigated the old Ford High Boy along the two-lane highway heading east toward Dothan. Leaf sat on the passenger side looking from the road over to Shelton, quick glances not meant to be staring. They were five miles from their homes and neither had started a serious conversation. There were the usual greetings but nothing about the birthday party or the kiss in the barn. The silence hung between them like hot humid air making it difficult to breathe.
The road curved hard left and Leaf saw they were coming up to a four-lane highway.
“This is 84 and it’ll take us to Dothan,” said Shelton, as if he could read Leaf’s mind.
As Shelton pulled out, Leaf noticed the few fast-food restaurants, the convenience store, and in front of them businesses along the north side of the road. A farm operation that looked like it was processing some crop, then office-warehouses and old metal buildings with a restoration shop. Scattered between the businesses were fields and houses.
“Shelton?”
Leaf could no longer stay silent. He had to ask the question.
“Do you think you could like me?”
Shelton sighed, then ran a hand through his dirty blonde hair, pushing it back from his face.
“You have doubts after last night?”
“Just being insecure…I guess.”
Shelton chuckled. “Yeah, I can understand that. I’ve never…”
“Never what?”
“Thought I could meet anyone in Enterprise. I’ve hooked up with four…no five guys over the last couple of years. The guys were passing through, someone I’d never see again, and I thought that was enough. I thought that was what I wanted, you know, no commitment therefore no hassle from my parents or others in the community.”
“And now?”
“Since you arrived, I sensed it. I knew when I first saw you; I just knew. It scared me, someone right across the street, and I avoided you for a while.”
“Do you still want to avoid me? Do you think last night was a mistake?”
“No, I don’t want to avoid you, nor do I think last night was a mistake. I’m glad we didn’t get caught.”
“But what if we had?”
“Then maybe it meant it was time to stop hiding it.”
Leaf knew the building was some early twentieth century style, exactly what he didn’t know, but he liked that it still existed and was now a restaurant. Shelton had drove past the front, then turned into a parking lot along the south side of it, parking out away from the other vehicles.
Walking along side of Shelton, they made their way back to the front and through the double doors. A bar ran along one side of the room with the dining area along the other. A hostess came toward them, blue dyed hair and a colorful blouse with jeans.
“Two for dinner?”
“Yes,” Shelton replied.
She led them to a table along the side wall and told them their waiter would be with them shortly.
Leaning over and lowering his voice, Leaf wanted to know how Shelton viewed the evening. “Thanks for inviting me to dinner. Do you think of this as a date?”
Shelton smiled then leaned over to speak quietly, his typical whisper. “Do you?”
The waiter arrived at their table, took drink orders, leaving them alone again.
Leaf carried most the conversation, talking about Boulder, his parents’ plans and the subsequent move to area below Enterprise. When dinner was finished, there was a hesitation to leave, each not wanting the night to end.
“Are you ready to go?” said Shelton.
“Sure.”
Leaf followed Shelton out of the restaurant and around to the truck. Shelton unlocked the passenger door and swung it open for him, then went around the back to get behind the wheel as Leaf buckled in. Shelton started the engine but didn’t put the truck in reverse, instead just sat with both hands on the steering wheel.
Leaf wondered what Shelton was thinking. He knew what he was thinking about. Did Shelton like him. Was he someone Shelton could consider a boyfriend, not worrying about what others would think.
“Shelton?”
“Yes?”
“I wish the night wasn’t over. What about you?”
Shelton put the truck in reverse, backed up quickly. He shifted into first and pulled away.
“Me too.”
It was such a soft whisper, Leaf wondered if he heard right. He didn’t reply, feeling like he should let Shelton say something else, anything, before he said anything else. Shelton drove north, back over the bridge, then turned left on four-lane they had driven in on. It seemed like such a long drive, sitting at redlights, moving along with the slow traffic, but suddenly Shelton was turning when Leaf expected him to keep going straight back toward Enterprise.
A short distance, and Shelton turned into the drive to a hotel, pulled up to the front parking in the Porte Cochere.
“I’ll be right back,” said Shelton, jumping out and going inside.
Was he seriously getting them a room? Leaf couldn’t believe it, but he smiled at the prospect, the idea of the two of them in a room. Alone.
Shelton came out slipping white key cards into his shirt pocket. He climbed in and without buckling up, drove around to the side of the lot, and down to the next building. He pulled into a space opposite the stairs to the second level, shut off the truck, and sat still. Leaf waited for him to say something.
“Is this alright?” said Shelton finally looking at Leaf. “Will you come up with me?”
“Yes.”
Once at the back of the truck ready to cross the drive aisle, Shelton took Leaf by the hand and led him to the stairs, up to the second level, and down to a room. Key card in the slot, the light went from red to green and the latch released. A lamp was on, and neither turned on any other light. They stood at the foot of the king size bed staring at each other.
“I’ve never done anything with a guy,” uttered Leaf.
“Yeah, I know. Do you trust me?”
“Yes.”
Shelton came up to Leaf, held his face between callous hands, just like before and kissed him. But this time no one would interrupt them. There would be no pushing apart out of fear or embarrassment. Instead, Leaf felt fingers undoing his shirt, button after button freed until his shirt hung open down the front and a hand touched his chest, rubbed over it raking across nipples then slipping around his waist, pulling them close together. The shirt slipped from his shoulders and hung in the crook of his elbows, and he gasped for breath as Shelton kissed down his neck and across the right shoulder, each press of lips to his bare skin arousing.
Leaf felt fingers undo his jeans, the waistband going loose. A hand pressed to his stomach then slid downward into the jeans and behind his boxers. Fingers raked through his public hair then touched him. He held his breath as lips moved up his neck and fingers rubbed his growing erection.
He opened his eyes to see Shelton stooped in front of him while dragging his jeans and boxers down. His cock angled out half hard and Shelton leaned to it, licked the head and up the shaft, then slipped the head between his lips and took nearly every inch into his mouth. Slipping fingers through the dirty blonde hair, Leaf held the head lightly feeling its motion, through his hands and on his cock. Especially on his cock. The warm mouth and the slide of lips along its length, then the tongue that worked the head until he was shivering. He lowered his hands and let his shirt slip to the floor. Shelton sat back and helped him out of his jeans and boxers, freeing each foot.
Naked. Completely naked. And aroused. Cock rock hard. Leaf stood in front of Shelton feeling his sexuality, the masculine nature of it. Hands rubbed up each leg, over each ass cheek, pulling him forward sinking his cock back into Shelton’s mouth. He closed his eyes and held his head back as the mouth moved on him again. This time was different. Shelton moving faster, at times holding his cock at the base and working just the head.
“Shelton…I’m going to come.”
Shelton pushed forward until lips were around the base and nose was pressed into his pubic hair. He felt the hot exhale and the push upward of the tongue. Then he shuddered with his release.
Shelton guided Leaf to the bed getting him to lay back on it. Standing by the bed, Shelton stripped, removing each garment unhurriedly as Leaf watched. The lean muscular build, the hard cock that curved up, thick and long. It looked formidable, bigger than he imagined, but he lusted after it, wanted to put it in his mouth. He imagined it as Shelton eased down on the bed next him. And he imagined more.
Shelton moved over Leaf, rolling him to his back and holding each hand down. Leaf felt that cock slid along side of his own, a slow steady rhythm that spoke to Shelton’s desire and lust. They kissed, uttered obscenities, and eventually, Leaf raised his knees spreading his legs and begged Shelton to fuck him. A hand slipped between them, the fingers working over his hard cock, manipulated the nuts until the sac was drawn up tight, then slipped further down until rubbing over his tight opening.
“Shelton.”
A finger penetrated Leaf, then another until three were working his hole, loosening him for Shelton’s fuck. He moaned with the feel of those fingers inside him. It aroused him. Made him feel sexually alive. He wanted the penetration. He kissed the neck up to the ear.
“Put it in me.”
Shelton shifted, until he got his cock in position, and he pushed against the loosened hole. While Leaf clung to him, he penetrated Leaf, pushed his cock through the tightness and kept pushing until buried in the ass. Leaf shivered with the feel of it. Shelton penetrating him, kissing him, touching him, rubbing naked body against naked body. He moved against him, pushed up as cock sank into him. He moaned and grunted and nipped at the earlobe then kissed along the jaw until their lips were pressed together.
Hands moved down his sides, cupped his ass as cock pumped inside him.
The hands moved back up his sides until their fingers were laced together and Shelton was holding him down.
Leaf opened his eyes and looked at the more muscular body, the dirty blonde hair hanging around the head, and the dark brown eyes staring down. He felt the way the body moved over him, how it pushed cock into his depths then tugged it outward, over and over until he didn’t think he could take it. His cock was rock hard. Desire consumed him, made him lust after Shelton’s fuck. He raised his knees, wrapped feet over Shelton’s thigh and held the undulating body taking Shelton’s fuck. Taking every inch.
“Leaf…I’m going to…”
An increase in pace, Shelton fucked harder and harder until the bed squeaked beneath them. He bearhugged Leaf, held their bodies tight together, trapping their heat, their sweat, as they moved slickly against each other. Shelton pushed into Leaf’s depths and ground hips against ass. Then Shelton jerked and shuddered as his cock erupted in Leaf’s depths and filled him with cum.
Leaf lay on his back feeling Shelton’s mouth on his cock. Lips. Tongue. All at once until he didn’t know what was manipulating him the most. All he knew was it felt better than he ever imagined, to have a guy, someone who wanted to be with him, take him in such a manner. He clutched at the bed, pushed upward with his hips, and came. Each ejaculation made him shudder. Every blast of cum into the suctioning mouth made him cry out or grunt. The mouth held his spurting cock until he was spent, then the lips moved upward tight to his shaft milking him dry.
They showered, running soapy hands over each other learning every curve of the other’s body. They kissed and touched and giggled like fools.
“We’ve got to go, or your parents will be mad,” said Shelton.
“I know, but…”
“But what?”
“I don’t want the night to end.”
“There will be other days. Better days. I promise.”
Until the end of the summer, Leaf and Shelton found ways to be alone. Drives down fire lanes or old logging camp sites on one river or another. In a barn or at the back of the property in the woods and when parents were away, the luxury of a bed.
When Leaf was preparing to leave for college, it became obvious something was going on between them. Shelton’s parents noticed it the most, how Shelton had gone from being more cheerful to being more morose than before. Eventually, Leaf being gay came out, and it was then obvious Shelton was too.
There were the usual denials, the push back, then questions. Slowly, over the last week Leaf was home, a gradual acceptance, wondering if Leaf going away for college would change Shelton’s mind.
It would not.
