I was 15 when I saw my first threesome in a straight porn video a neighborhood kid brought over. It changed me. The star was Candi Evans, and the magical scene happened during a camping scenario that played out in front of a tent with her on all fours, panties still on and pulled to the side while one guy was behind her slamming away on her pussy, then ass, while the other was in front of her, mercilessly fucking her face. Then the men switched roles until both exploded all over her. There were five guys in the room watching with me, but I'm fairly certain I was the only one fantasizing about being Candi (when you're gay, you know early). I knew right then and there I needed this experience, and sure enough it happened nine years later, at age 24, just outside Boston. The reality exceeded every fantasy I'd envisioned, and I still jerk off to memories of those amazing hours to this very day, over two decades later.
It was arranged on a Friday afternoon I'd taken off work, via the old gay dot com chat service. I had a screen name like "submissive bttm boi" or something similar, and got a ping from 2 tops seeking a third for an "afternoon of domination". I replied with my stats and what I was into. They sent me an address and told me to wear black, lacy panties. I said I'd be there in 30. My heart was thrashing. Was this really going to happen?! I was closeted (still am), super cautious, afraid to have too many gay experiences as I lived in a smaller area and didn't want it getting out. I'm also 6'2, 190, with a shave head and muscular build. Most people assume I'm a rugged biker type who digs tatted out, stripper-esque women. Oh, the irony. But I had no choice. It was like being caught in an under-toe. I was on autopilot. I had slipped on a black, lacy thong, printed out directions on MapQuest, had on a sweatsuit, and was already in my Jetta and on my way, squirming in my seat with a wet ass, before I even knew what was happening.
I rang the apartment and they buzzed me in. There was an older man, more sensual and romantic, and a younger man, dominant and uninhibited. When I walked in they were watching comedy central, some show with Amy Sedaris, I recall. The older man asked me if I'd like a beer or anything and I said yes. He brought me a Sam Adams. The younger man smoked a cigarette and glared at me from time to time, somehow able to see clean through my facade, straight to the submissive, sissy bottom I truly am. This always fascinated me growing up, at the mall with friends, pretending to be a badass, how we'd walk past a gay man and my friends wouldn't even register him. But I couldn't help but sneak a look, and when I did he'd be staring right into me, my core, smiling, knowing exactly who I really am in an instant: a panty-wearing faggot bottom who'd dress up and ride a dildo he kept hidden in his room, then suck it clean until he came every night. That was me. That is me. And every gay man could see it, especially the younger man in that apartment. As if he could read my mind, he said, "Strip down to your panties, crawl to the bedroom, and be on your knees with your mouth open, faggot. We'll be right in."
I did as I was told. Stripped to my thong, crawled on all fours to the bedroom, and remained on my knees with my mouth open and watering, waiting. I noticed a large, landscape oriented mirror on the dresser facing one side of the bed. I was trembling. This was actually happening. I was going to be in a three-way! Insane! My cock stiffened against the lacy front of my panties, already moist with pre-cum. My ass was tingling in anticipation. Then they walked in, both naked.
"No cock for you yet, faggot," the younger man said as he approached and stood in front of me, his 8" cock dangling an inch from my hungry mouth. "You want that don't you?"
"Yes," I said.
He leaned down and slapped my right ass cheek. He stood back up, my ass still quivering and said, "Yes, what?"
"Yes, sir," I replied instinctively. I'd never been dominated before, but understood it's mechanics and the expectations at once.
"Good boy. You get to lick my ass as a reward. You wanna taste my ass?"
"Yes, sir," I said.
"Say it."
"I want to taste your ass, sir."
"Beg, faggot."
"May I please taste your ass, sir?"
"Good boy. Yeah, you may go ahead and lick my ass," he said as he turned around. The older man grabbed the back of my head and pushed my face between the younger man's ass cheeks. I licked his crack up and down, savoring that sour taste I'd come to love, then began to kiss and tongue his asshole, with total abandon. It tasted so fucking good, and felt so right servicing his ass as his friend kept pressure applied to the back my head, keeping me locked in, right where I belonged.
"Yeah," he said. "That's it, boy. You wanna suck our cocks, don't you?"
"Yes," I said, my voice muffled, buried in his ass. He took a step forward and turned around, his cock rising towards my face.
"But that's not entirely true, is it? You don't want to suck our cocks. You NEED to suck our cocks. Isn't that right, you panty-boy faggot?
"Yes, sir."
"Say it, boy."
"I need to suck your cocks."
"Beg, faggot."
"Please allow me to suck your cocks, sir."
"Not really okay, but I'll allow you get what you need. This time. But you'll have to do way better if you want me to cum in your ass, then let you lick my cock clean afterwards. Open wide, sissy."
I almost came, right there. If I'd touched my rock hard cock, I would have instantly. Good thing the older man grabbed both my wrists and held them against the bottom my spine. He whispered in my ear, "Suck him good, baby. I need to see you enjoy it."
I licked his cock from base to tip, like a popsicle, over and over again, my hands pinned behind me. It was thick and throbbing in time with his pulse, it's slight curve becoming more pronounced. I took it in my mouth and started sucking. The older man kissed my neck and nibbled at my ear as I did, his breath hot against my skin. The younger man grabbed the sides of my head now. He said:
"Don't move, faggot. Don't suck. Just keep your lips on my cock."
He then began to slide his cock in and out of my mouth, like a hole he was fucking, his hands on either side of my head, holding me steady. The older man slapped my ass a few times, then pulled the thong out of my crack and started fingering my ass. I was squirming, moaning, and felt like I was going to explode. The younger man sensed this and said, "Don't you dare cum, panty boy. You need to get fucked first. Get on the bed, on all fours. Now."
"Wait," said the older man as I stood up. He needs to clean my finger first."
He slowly stuck his finger, coated and glistening with my ass juice, into my mouth, his eyes locked on mine. "Clean it, baby," he said.
We held eye contact as I licked that finger clean, the taste of my ass setting my mouth watering, needing more, which I'd get plenty of soon. He slowly withdrew his finger, wiped it down my chin and said, "I'm gonna watch him fuck you now. But when I'm ready and standing in front of you, you better suck me good. Got it?"
"Yes, sir."
He French kissed me, long and deep, with one of his hands gently around my throat. The make out went on for about thirty more seconds before he withdrew, saying, "Time to get fucked, baby."
I climbed on the bed, thinking I'd be prissy and cute, getting on all fours with my knees together, ass up and lower back arched, thong back between my cheeks, soaked through with pre-cum now.
"No, no, no, whore. Spread 'em," the younger man said as he positioned himself behind me, the tip of his dripping cock tickling my asshole. I spread my knees apart and lowered my ass. I turned to the left saw myself in the mirror, who I really am. Bent over, cheeks spread apart, wearing panties, eager to have this dominant top take ownership of me by driving his massive dick into my tight ass, giving him whatever he wants until he cums inside me. Then doing the same for his friend. Submitting to these men, entirely, and without inhibition. I watched as the younger man prepared to do exactly that, pouring lube on his thick rod, ready and waiting. He stroked the lube on, coating it from base to tip. Then without a word, he pulled the thong to one side, pushed himself all the way into me, and held it there, balls deep.
"Don't you fucking move."
I was shaking. It hurt, I wasn't ready! It was too much! His cock was too big and it went in too fast! I was panicking, about to lean forward for relief, but again he knew my thoughts! How?!
"Relax, faggot. Relaaaaaax. Let it settle inside your little faggot pussy."
The older man approached and leaned down into my face. He French kissed me again, long and deep, his tongue dancing with mine as my body, and asshole relaxed. "That's it, baby," he said pulling back and maintaining eye contact. He stood to his full height, his own 7" cock stiffening before my eyes.
"Not yet," the younger man said. "You'll be allowed to suck in a minute or two."
And so, so slowly, he pulled back, his thick, long cock sliding almost all the way out of my ass, before he pushed it all the way back in again. Over and over he did this, in and out, slow, breaking me in, taking possession of my entire body. My ass was relaxed, fully split open and clenching around his girthy cock as he began to fuck me harder.
The older man stepped closer and put his cock in face. "Suck, baby," he said. I took it into my mouth and as ordered, sucked it, so deep the tip was leaking pre-cum against the back of my throat. I couldn't help myself. I glanced at the huge mirror.
And there I was. A twenty-four year old closeted, submissive faggot bottom, being spit-roasted by a pair of dominant tops. The younger man was really drilling me hard now. I could feel his balls slamming against my ass and could see his cock sliding in and out of me, glistening in the soft light, wet with lube and the moisture from my ass. I was in such ecstasy and breathing so hard I could barely focus on sucking the big cock in my mouth, but still managed to do such a good job the older man who wielded it was starting to twitch, getting close. The younger man saw me looking in the mirror and pounced.
"Take a good look, faggot. That is who you are. Right there. Fucking say it!"
"This is who I am."
He slapped my ass hard, now beet red with handprints.
"Keeping that fucking cock in your mouth, faggot! Say it again, louder, and keep sucking!"
"This is who I am." I choked out, the huge cock pulsing in mouth.
"AGAIN!" the younger man said, slapping my ass even harder, adding, "LOUDER!"
My ass cheeks were on fire. He was grabbing my hips, ramming his cock into me so hard now I could barely take it.
"This who I am!" I squealed between gulps of the older man's cock.
"That's right!" he said. "Your fucking friends all think you're some kind of tough guy, don't they? Answer me!"
"Yes, sir!" I conceded. "They do, sir!"
"But that's not you," he said with a laugh. "THIS is you, right here! Keep your eyes open and look in the mirror!"
The older man was going to cum. I could tell. I looked in the mirror as ordered and saw that I was sucking his cock furiously, out of control, the older man responding by thrusting it deep into my throat, making me gag. Tears streamed down my cheeks as the younger man barked at me, verbally and physically dominating me as he stuffed that giant cock in and out of my dripping, wanton ass.
"THAT is who are you, faggot! Right there!" the younger man ordered. "Say it!"
"This is who I am!" I said.
"I gonna cum, baby!" the older man grunted
The younger man shoved his cock balls deep into my ass and held it there. He grabbed my thong by both sides and said:
"Listen good, you sissy bottom faggot. You spill one drop and I won't cum in your ass! You fucking hear me?!"
"Yes, sir!"
"Tell me who you are!"
"I'm a sissy bottom faggot!" I squealed with delight.
"You LOVE this! Say it again!"
"I'm a sissy, bottom, panty-boy faggot!" I declared, knowing it was true.
"Yeah, you are!" the younger man said gleefully. "And you're MY sissy, bottom, panty-boy faggot!"
"Here I cum!" The older man said, grabbing my head at both sides, thrusting his cock in deep as he exploded in my whore mouth. Hot and salty, his jizz spewed down my throat in a geyser, and I swallowed every delicious drop. The younger man stayed behind me, holding me in place, watching me in the mirror, making sure I didn't squander a drop of that yummy cum.
And I didn't. I licked and sucked every bit of jizz from that drained, softening cock. He pulled back, spent and gasping for air. The younger man resumed his domination of my ass, fucking me hard at once again.
"Taste good, faggot?" he taunted.
"Yes, sir."
"Louder!" he commanded, slapping my ass again. "What tasted good?!"
"His load, sir! It tasted amazing, sir!"
I was delirious. Swooning. I'd never experienced real domination. I'd fantasized about it forever, but the reality was light years beyond anything my mind had conjured. I was going to explode myself.
"What do you need, boy?!"
"I need you to cum in my ass, sir!"
"What else, faggot?!"
"I need to lick your cock clean after you cum in my ass!"
"Yeah, faggot," he said. "I know you do. Because this is who you are, isn't it?"
"Yes, sir!"
"SAY IT AGAIN!"
"This is who I am, sir!"
He was absolutely pounding me now. His cock was so stiff if felt like marble. His front side banging against my beet red ass, panties to one side. He grip on my hips tightened. He was close. I needed him to seed me. To mark me as his.
"Beg for my load, like the good little faggot bottom you are," he ordered, totally in control, focused now. Determined to mark his territory.
"PLEASE, cum in my ass, master."
"I can't hear you, boy."
Please, please, PLEASE cum in my ass, master! I need your cum in my ass, master!"
"WHO'S YOUR MASTER?"
"You are, sir! You own me, master! PLEEEEASE come in my ass!"
"Take it, faggot!"
He drove himself all the way inside my asshole and burst. The load was massive, released in six, long spews. I felt the wad explode inside me. God, there was so much! His cock held semi erect and he slid it in and out, my ass now so slippery and wet it moved in and out of me effortlessly. After five more slow, deliberate thrusts he withdrew and moved my thong back into place. Immediately, I felt his sticky, hot cum drip out of my ass and soak the black lace resting against my pounded, throbbing asshole.
"Beg for you meal, bottom boy."
"May I please clean your cum and my ass off your beautiful cock with my tongue, master?"
"Good boy. Keep your eyes open and watch yourself in the mirror, faggot."
"Yes, master," I purred and turned to face my master. In that moment I'd have done anything for him. Anything. This was first person in my life to see me. All of me. The real me. The bottom faggot. The panty boy I'm so afraid to show the world. Me. This is who I am. He saw. He knew. And he gave me exactly what I've needed my whole life. He still was giving it to me. No more talk. Just me and his cock, with his delicious cum and my ass lube streaked all over it. And a job to do.
Lick it clean.
I took it in my mouth and polished it to a shine. I licked every bit of cum and every trace of my pleasured ass from that magnificent cock. When I was done I looked up at my master, who'd been watching me with approval.
"You want to cum now, boy?"
"Please, sir."
"Crawl to the bathroom, in the tub. Be on your knees. We're not done with you yet, faggot."
I did as ordered. I was in the bathtub on my knees. They both walked in, cocks flaccid and swinging in front of them.
The younger man spoke. “Open your bitch mouth, faggot.”
I opened it. Both men approach the tub, gripped their shafts and proceeded to piss hot streams of urine all over my face.
“Drink it down, panty boy. Every drop.”
I gulped down as much as I could, but it was a downpour. Two streams of piss spraying me about the head and face was just too much. I kept my tongue out, hoping that’d be enough to please my master as the warm urine rained down all over me, a baptism to the truth of myself.
“Now, faggot. Cum you little bottom bitch! NOW!!!”
I stroked my cock two times. That was all it took and my cock exploded in a creamy white spew that had to be seen to be believed. There was cum everywhere. I’d sprayed the tub all over in front of me. I was exhausted, spent, gasping. Their bladders were emptied, just a few drops left, and there I was. In a bathtub. Soaked in piss, both my stomach and ass pumped full of cum, and wearing dripping panties.
“Now lick it up, faggot,” the younger man commanded.
And I did. As I licked up my own load from the surface of the tub, the younger man chuckled, got dressed, and left. I never saw him again. The older man showered with me and we made love three more times, well into the night. It was the opposite of before. It was sensual, loving, and sexy. He even had clean, white lingerie (lacy boys shorts and thigh-high fishnets) for me to wear, too. He came in my ass twice, and once in my mouth.
I saw him on and off for the next year, but only one on one. He was a sensitive lover, I think I fell for him, but I was too much of a coward to push ahead with him as I wanted to, and moved west. I am married today, to a woman, and live in the closet. My sexual encounters with men are far and few between, but there have been some amazing ones. I think of these men and what they did to me often, and how they are the only humans out there who know who I really am, just as that amazing younger man did.
I need to let the submissive bottom faggot out again again. And I know I will one day.
