Teddy
I was staring at myself in the mirror, tying my tie. It was May 19, 1985, the day I had waited for my entire 18 years. I was finally graduating from high school. I stood back and took another look at myself. I guess I looked pretty good, my jet-black hair was parted down the middle with my bangs feathered back. My blue eyes sparkled as I blinked, my long eyelashes flittered. More than one girl had told me that they wished they had my eyelashes. I ran my hand across my freshly shaven chin, I was one of the few guys in my class that could already grow a full beard. The patch of hair that was spreading across my chest was also more than any of my classmates had. My smile produced two dimples that all the girls seemed to like too. I shrugged, I’m no Tom Cruise, but I’m not a troll either and had been referred to as cute on more than one occasion.
I walked out of my room and through the dining room that mom had decorated for the get together that she was hosting for me after my graduation ceremony. She invited our family and a few close friends to the house to help celebrate. I looked at the table with the cake that had “Congratulations Teddy, Class of ‘85” printed in red frosting. There were several bowls of mixed nuts and mints sitting next to the cake, as well as paper plates and napkins. I smiled as I looked at my senior picture propped up behind the cake, there was also a picture of my dad on the right and a picture of grandpa on the left. A quick look at the three pictures would make you think they were of the same person. We were all 18 when the pictures were taken, grandpa in 1942, dad in 1961 and me today. Grandpa was in his army uniform just before he was leaving for France, his hair combed straight back. Dad was wearing a light grey suit with a narrow black tie, his hair parted on the right and held in place with a generous amount of Brill Cream. It was the same face in each picture, just a different hair style and suit that represented the time in which the pictures were taken. We all had the same eyes and smiles.
I chuckled at how even though we looked alike, our lives couldn’t be more different at that age. At 18, grandpa was soon heading to France to fight in World War II. I was scared to death to leave for college in a few months, I couldn’t even imagine facing what grandpa was about to endure. The good news was, grandpa would only have to spend 6 months in France, the bad news was, he returned home without his right hand. He and 4 of his fellow soldiers were in a fox hole when a grenade landed at his feet. His first instinct was to throw the grenade back at the enemy, it exploded just as he released it, which saved his buddies and his life, but it cost him his hand. Because he was always the glass is half full kind of guy, grandpa always joked that it cost most people an arm and leg to take a trip to Europe, it only cost him a hand.
Grandpa was home before Christmas that year and was getting married to my grandma. Nine months later, my dad was born. Again, I can’t imagine being married with a kid before the age of 20, but grandpa did it. He took his disability pay from the army and bought an empty building in town and started an auto parts store in 1945. He again joked that he was either the smartest man on earth, or the luckiest. The auto industry boomed after the war and so did grandpa’s business. By the 1950’s grandpa had three stores in neighboring towns, each about 10 miles apart. Grandpa retired in 1980, and dad took over the business and still runs it today.
I looked at dad’s picture, he also had to grow up quickly. He didn’t have to go to war like grandpa, but within 3 months of graduating from high school, he married my mom and six months later my brother Jeff was born. Dad had grandpa’s sense of humor and to this day claims, the first kid can be born any time after a wedding, after that they take nine months. Again, I couldn’t imagine having a family at this stage in my life, and by the time dad was 24 he had three kids. My sister, Becky, was born two years after Jeff and I was born 4 years later.
I am thankful that grandpa and dad did what they did, it has given me a pretty good life. We lived in a nice house, always had food on the table and clothes on our backs and I was now going to be able to go to college. Jeff had just graduated from college and had taken over managing one of dad’s stores, he and his girlfriend, Sue, were planning their wedding for later this year. Becky had one more year of college and had also recently introduced us to her boyfriend, Mike. I’m sure once they finished school, a wedding would also be in their plans.
I sighed to myself, I know my parents love me and are proud of all their kids, but I think dad is less than thrilled with my choice of career. Jeff and Becky were business majors, following in dad’s footsteps. I, for some reason, want to be a high school math teacher. I grew up in that parts store and to this day know what spark plugs a 1977 Chevy Nova takes, but I just don’t want to spend the next 40 years selling them. Dad has never come out and said that he was disappointed that I didn’t want to run one of his stores, but I could sense it when we talked about me going to college. I really think he wanted both of his sons to run a store and then take over when he was ready to retire.
The other thing that was starting to bother me was the feelings I was having about the whole girlfriend thing. Jeff had started dating right after he got into high school and had several girlfriends by the time he graduated. I was leaving high school without ever having a date, let alone a steady girlfriend. Dad had even mentioned it a few times, but mom would just say that I would find a girlfriend when I was ready. The truth was, I had just figured out that I had no interest in girls at all. For the last four years I had been fighting the feeling that I was attracted to guys, I was starting to realize that I was gay. I did my best to hide it and so far, I have been successful. None of my friends or family have ever brought the subject up. In this small, conservative, midwestern town, I knew it was best not to rock the boat. I guess I was hoping that going to college in a city two hours away would give me the chance to figure things out for sure.
I was startled out of my daydream when mom walked in and put her arm around my shoulder. She said, “you look just like your dad and grandpa.”
I chuckled, “yeah, I didn’t realize how much until I saw those three pictures together.”
Mom laughed, “that’s why I set them up next to each other, Jeff and Becky both look like me, but you got all of your genes from the Baker side of the family.”
I sighed, “so, what are you and dad going to do with your empty nest in three months when I leave for college?”
She said, “well, if Jeff and Sue follow our family history, I’m sure we’ll have grandkids running around here very soon.”
I laughed, “yeah, you’re probably right.”
She asked, “don’t you have to get going? You are supposed to be at the school in 15 minutes.”
I smiled, “yeah, I better go, see you at the ceremony.”
She gave me a hug and I headed out the door. I pulled into the school parking lot and smiled as CJ parked beside me. CJ Miller had been my best friend since 1st grade. He got out of his car and wrapped me in a big bear hug. At 6’, he was 2 inches taller than me and his wavy blonde hair and fair skin was in complete contrast to my dark hair and skin. CJ was your typical jock, and his entire school year revolved around whatever sport in season. His dad was the head football coach, so his athletic ability was natural. Even though his dad was the coach, CJ was never shown any preferential treatment, if anything his dad was harder on him than any of the other players. He actually was a better baseball player than a football player. He was the team’s pitcher and had received a scholarship to play baseball in college. I would be lying if I said I never fantasized about being with CJ, but I didn’t want to ruin our friendship, besides he has been dating Wendy since the 10th grade. Wendy was also going to attend the same college as CJ and me this fall. I was glad I was going to have someone I knew when I left for college, and that someone being my best friend was even better.
He broke our hug and said, “we made it buddy, in an hour we will never have to set foot in this old jail again, no more Mrs. Paige’s English class, or Old Man Graham’s biology.”
I laughed, “yeah, just remember that in five years, two other kids are going to be having this same conversation about old man Miller’s history class and Mr. Baker’s math class.”
He slapped my shoulder, “oh hell no, we are going to be those cool teachers, that all the kids love.”
I laughed as he put his arm around my shoulder, and we walked into the school. CJ was going to play baseball in college, but he was also going to get his teaching degree in history, so he could be a high school coach, like his dad.
We walked into Mrs. Paige’s classroom to find the rest of our friends putting on their robes and caps. We found our robes and joined them. We had a pretty tight friend group and had all been together for our entire school career. The first one to say hi to CJ and me was Donnie, he was our star quarterback and, in my opinion, had the sweetest ass of anyone in the entire school. Of course, I never told anyone else that. He was going to community college to be an electrician, and work for his dad’s company. Wally joined us next, he was holding his 1-month-old daughter, he would be married next month and had gotten a job at the local grain elevator. Again, I couldn’t imagine having a family at this age, but Wally was dealing with it well. Ray was another jock, excelling in basketball, he was going to college with his girlfriend Laura, and had decided on business administration as his major. Bob was going to trade school to be a mechanic and work in his uncle’s repair shop. Tammy was going to cosmetology school, Carla was going to be an elementary teacher, and Heather was going to be a nurse.
We laughed and talked about our high school years and were sure we had our lives figured out. We were told it was time to line up to go to the gym. I took one more look around the room at all my friends and even though we said we would keep in touch forever, I knew this would probably be the last time I saw some of them. The ones that I did see again, would probably be at our 5- or 10-year reunion.
CJ
As I got ready for my high school graduation ceremony, I walked into the kitchen to find my dad.
I said, “can you help with this tie, dad?”
Dad smirked and he said, “sure, let me show you one more time. You know you really should learn how to do this yourself.”
I chuckled, “yeah, I know. I told mom to get me a clip on, but she liked this one better.”
Dad nodded as he pulled the tie tight, “yeah, she just wants us to look good.”
He stood back and looked me up and down and said, “we are proud of you, CJ.”
I gave him a hug, “thanks dad.”
I knew my dad loved me, but it was rare for him to express it. Being a football coach, it was more common for him to be yelling or explaining the correct way to be doing something. I was his only son and his youngest child. My two older sisters, Connie and Sarah, were already out of the house. Connie had just got married and Sarah was finishing her third year of college. Like my dad, Connie already had her teaching degree in high school English, and Sarah was studying to be an elementary school teacher. I was also following that path, I had a scholarship to play baseball in college, but I knew I would probably never make it to the major league. I knew I wanted to coach, so like many coaches, I was going to be a history major.
Mom came into the kitchen and said, “Charlie, you better let CJ go, he needs to be to the school in 20 minutes.”
Dad said, “I’m not keeping him, he can leave whenever he wants.”
I gave mom a hug and smiled, “I’m leaving now mom, I have plenty of time.”
I was named Charles Joeseph, after my dad, and my dad was named the same after his dad. Grandpa always went by Charles, and dad went by Charlie. When I was born, the family tried to call me Chuck, but by the time I started school, I hated that name. I was able to convince everyone to use CJ, and other than by a few old teachers, who insisted I was Charles, all my friends called me CJ.
When I got to school, I parked my car next to Teddy, my best friend, since I moved to this town in 1st grade. Teddy was the first kid to say hi to me on the first day of school and we have been inseparable ever since. He was the brother that I never had and had always wanted. We were always at each other’s houses, and both sets of our parents treated us like we were their own. We had lots of other friends, but we were closer to each other than we were to anyone else. I couldn’t help but smile as we got out of our cars, seeing Teddy always brought a smile to my face. His laugh was so contagious, God, that laugh. It wasn’t overly loud or obnoxious, but it was very distinct. Whenever I heard it, I knew Teddy was in the room, again it always caused me to smile. It didn’t take long to learn that he got it from his dad, and the first time I met his grandpa, it was clear that laugh ran in the family.
We shared a hug and went inside to join the rest of our friends to get ready for our graduation ceremony. As we were putting our robes and caps on, we were talking about all the big plans we had for the future. I was thinking about the last 12 years with all these guys, when we reached junior high, Mikey, Bobby and Johnny suddenly became Mike, Bob and John. We tried to call Teddy, Ted, but it never seemed right. He will always be Teddy to me, and everyone else in our class. By high school, it was clear that we had different interests. I was so much more interested in sports than Teddy, and he was an academic. Even so, we remained the best of friends, he tried football for one year and played basketball for two years. By the time we were juniors Teddy was happy to go to the games to support me and our other friends, he never missed a game. He even became our unofficial tutor whenever we were having a little trouble in one of our classes. He was especially helpful in math classes. He was going to make a great math teacher.
Once we were ready, Wendy joined me and Teddy, giving us both a hug. Wendy and I have been together since 10th grade, I gave her a kiss. She was a cute petite blonde with the most beautiful blue eyes and a sexy little ass. I have wanted to see that ass naked since our first date, but she insisted that we wait until after graduation. I was hoping that after today, I was going to get to feel that ass without it being covered by her pants.
She said, “ok, CJ and Teddy stand over there I want a picture of you two.”
We put our arms around each other and smiled as she snapped our pic. She handed Teddy the camera and he took a picture of me and Wendy. Soon we were taking pictures with all our other classmates.
I was glad that Wendy and Teddy got along so well, and she never seemed to mind that he would join us a lot. Teddy was good about not staying too long so Wendy and I could still have some alone time. Wendy even tried to set him up with some of her friends, but Teddy never really seemed to be interested. Wendy told me several times that it was too bad that Teddy was so shy around girls, Tammy and Carla had told her several times that they thought he was cute. They evidently lost interest and soon moved on to other boys. I never really pushed Teddy, as he always changed the subject whenever I brought it up.
We were told to line up to go to the gym. An hour later we were standing outside in front of the school throwing our caps in the air and being congratulated by our families and friends. We were high school graduates.
We all left the school for the last time and headed home for our celebrations with our families. We were all going to meet later for a graduation party of our own. Bob’s parents agreed to let us hold our get together in their garage. Bob’s dad even agreed to buy us beer, as long as we all gave him our car keys when we arrived. His mom set blankets and sleeping bags in the basement, so we all were expected to stay the night. We, of course, told our parents that we would be spending the night, and my dad and Teddy’s dad told us that if we did want to come home, we were to call and they would come get us, no matter what time of night it was.
The party was a lot of fun and by the end of the night about 20 of us were stumbling down the steps to the basement. The rest of the class all went home, after they proved to Bob’s dad that they hadn’t been drinking. Wendy and I of course cuddled together, as did Ray and Laura, and there were a few others that had gotten together over the course of the night. Teddy found a sleeping bag and was sleeping in a recliner.
The next morning, we all woke up and found that all our moms had pitched in to make us a big breakfast. The food really hit the spot and helped our hangovers. After we ate, we all helped Bob clean up the mess in the garage, as per our deal with his dad for letting us have the party. We all headed home, and I took a nap.
We all got started on our last summer at home. My college baseball coach had given me a workout routine for the summer, and I was going to report to college two weeks before classes started. We would have practice to get ready for our fall season. Dad was having workouts for his football team, so I was able to use the school’s weight room for my workouts. Teddy was working in his dad’s auto parts store, but his dad would let him off work whenever he wanted, so we were still spending a lot of time together.
About a week before I was going to leave for baseball practice, we decided to have one last fling. We had been getting together out at old man Wilson’s pond the entire time we had been in high school. Wilson’s pond was about 2 miles outside of town and the first time we went out there, we asked Mr. Wilson if we could fish and swim there. He agreed as long as we didn’t leave trash all over the place, he even brought out a couple of trash cans for us. We always made sure to clean up and when we went fishing, we always threw the fish back. There weren’t a lot of fish in the pond, and they were just small blue gills and sunfish, we were just fishing for something to do and none of us wanted to clean the fish to eat them anyway.
We found someone to buy us some beer, and we all headed out to the pond. Wendy didn’t like beer, so she was going to be our designated driver, a couple of the other girls were doing the same for the rest of the guys. There were about 15 of us sitting at the edge of the pond, again talking about how we were going to conquer the world after we finished college. The temperature was in the eighties and soon all of guys were all shirtless as we finished off our beer. The girls all decided they were bored and all left to go to Wendy’s house for a while. We agreed upon a time for them to come back and pick us up.
After the girls left, Donnie stood and stretched and said, “hey, who wants to go for a swim?”
Ray said, “I didn’t bring my swimsuit.”
Donnie grinned, “neither did I.” He promptly dropped his pants as was running to the pond his bare ass bouncing all the way. Within a minute the rest of us were joining him, what the hell, we were all guys and had seen each other naked many times in the locker room.
I noticed that Teddy was the last to strip and head to the pond. It had been two years since he played basketball, and I had not seen him without his clothes since then. I had never paid too much attention to other guys in the locker room, other than a quick look to compare bodies, just to see who was the best looking. As I watched Teddy dive into the water, I thought wow, he has nothing to be ashamed of. The hair on his chest had spread down across his stomach, he was probably the hairiest guy in our class, and it looked good on him. I even caught myself looking at his hairy ass, it was just as nice as Wendy’s, which I finally got to see two weeks after graduation. Wendy’s was of course smooth, but Teddy’s was shaped just as nice as hers.
We spent about an hour splashing around and pushing each other under the water. Teddy was staying in the water that covered him to his chest, and he was sort of keeping to himself. I saw him get out of the water and quickly get dressed. The rest of us soon followed, the girls would be coming to pick us up soon. We were all dressed when the first girls arrived, they told me Wendy was coming in a few minutes, she had to run her little sister to a friend’s house. Everyone else left and Teddy and I sat by the pond to wait for Wendy.
I asked, “did you have a good time?”
Teddy smiled, “sure, it was a lot of fun.”
I said, “you were kind of quiet. Did it bother you that we all went skinny dipping?”
He shook his head, “no, it didn’t bother me, I was just a little nervous, that’s all.”
I asked, “nervous? About what?”
Teddy took a deep breath, “you’re my best friend and I can tell you anything, right?”
I nodded, “of course.”
He sighed, “I was nervous about seeing all the other guys naked, I was afraid I might get… aroused.”
I asked, “what are you saying Teddy?”
He hung his head, “you are the only one I feel like I can tell this to. CJ, I think I am gay.”
To be Continued…
