Jeff woke from what seemed to be a deep sleep. It was still dark, and he could only see the shadows of a room that smell dank and dusty. He grabbed his head. “My head hurts. I think this is the worst headache I’ve ever had.”
“All of our heads hurt,” said the voice of a woman. Jeff seemed to recognize her, but he wasn’t sure from where.”
“My head hurts, too.” A little boy’s voice from behind his shoulder.
“Mine does as well, Jeffie,” said a man with a calming voice. “Just sit in your chair and close your eyes. It will get better.”
Jeff tried to stand up. “Where am I?” He couldn’t tell if he was attached to the seat or whether his legs were immobilized.
“You are here,” said the woman. “You have always been here.”
“I don’t understand,” said Jeff. “I recognize your voice, but I don’t know you.”
“He’s not going to get it,” said the man. “I’m not sure I get it, but it is.”
“It is what?” asked Jeff.
“It just is,” the man said. “Sister, tell him.”
“Yes, sister, tell me.”
“Think of this room as your mind. You have always been here, but you were unaware of the rest of us. Dr. Sanches has allowed you to be aware. This is where you always are, but sometimes you are also out there.
“I’ve been out there, too,” announced Jeffie.
The man spoke up. “Jeffie went out there for you whenever Nathan was around. To protect you.”
“I’m sorry, Jeffie.” Jeff tried again to stand up.. “I should have protected you from him.”
“No,” said Jeffie. “I’m here to protect you. We all are. Well, except for Roger. He doesn’t help anyone. He just wants…”
“That’s enough, Jeffie,” the man said. ”Those are things for Roger to tell.”
“Where is Roger?” demanded Jeff.
“Don’t you know?” asked the man. “He’s out there.”
“How do I get out there?”
There was silence.
Jeff began to shout. “I want to know how to get out there!”
The man was calm. “I’ve only been out when you let me out. I don’t know how to get out. Roger shouldn’t be able to get out without your permission.”
Sister spoke up, “But Roger knows how to get out now without Jeff’s calling him out, and I don’t know how to get him back.”
* * *
Roger had been out for several days, and he liked it. In the past, he had only come out when Jeff was conflicted about his attraction to men, but Dr. Sanches had opened a door when he called Jeffie out to talk about the abuse.
“Abuse,” Roger said out loud, and then laughed. He was alone in the elevator on his way to see Dr. Sanches. He heard a woman’s voice. “Your place is here with us.”
“Shut up, bitch,” he sneered. “I’m not going back. There’s too much fun to be had out here.”
The elevator doors opened, and he walked out and went to the door to Sanches’ office. ‘You’re going to show him that you’re in charge.’ Roger took a deep breath and relaxed; he shook away his confident air and walked in quietly.
The receptionist directed him to the office. “Doctor will attend you in just a few minutes.”
“Thank you,” Roger responded quietly. He went in and sat quietly in the same chair Jeff always sat in.
Dr. Sanches joined him a few moments later. “How’s this last week been for you, Jeff?”
Roger smiled. “It’s been better. Fewer headaches, and I’m remembering a few things. I feel less stressed. I’d like to see how things go for a few weeks.”
“You don’t want to push things along faster? I thought that’s what you wanted, to accelerate the healing process.”
“I’m not sure I want integration,” Roger said. He thought, ‘Integration will kill me; fuck integration.’
“That’s OK, too. But I want you to have all the facts, and I want to continue to investigate what happened to you.”
“I appreciate that, Doctor.” Roger stood up. “I’m going to take a break. About a month. We can see where we are then.”
“Are you sure you want to end the session?”
“I’m sure. Thank you. I’ll call your office in a couple of weeks.”
Roger turned and headed back downstairs. At the bottom, he walked slowly around. He had noticed a sexy uniformed security agent upon entering the building. He hoped to find him. He saw four other security employees on his walk; none were as sexy as the one for whom he searched. Disappointed by not seeing him, Roger started running possible places to pick up a guy through his head.
“Hey, handsome, looking for me? I’m just now getting off duty.”
Roger smiled. He wanted to grab the man’s ass cheek, but he held back.
“Follow me.” He led Roger to an office a floor below. He locked the door and turned to find Roger’s face just inches from his own.
Roger ran his index finger over the man’s name badge. “L. Terrell.” He pushed his lips against the lips of the man in uniform.
“Leonard. Call me Len.”
“I’m Roger, and I want to fuck you, Len.”
“Shit. I thought you might want me to blow you. You really want to screw me?”
“From the second I saw you.”
Len smiled. He pulled Roger into the next room where lockers lined the walls and a bench stood between them. “No one comes in here anymore. There’s a new room with a bank of showers on the other side. We won’t be bothered.”
Roger kissed Len forcefully. He sucked Len’s tongue into his mouth and reached down to fondle his dick and balls.
Len responded by pulling Roger closer to him with one arm and rubbed his right hand over Roger’s crotch.
Roger moved his hands to Len’s ass and ground their crotches together. “I’ve always wanted to fuck a cop.”
“I’m not really a cop.”
“You are to me. Uniform. Maintaining order. Keeping people safe. Fuck, you’re making me hard. Sit down, straddle the bench.”
With Len on the bench, Roger pushed him back, unbuckled him and pulled his pants and underwear to his knees. “Grab your knees,” commanded Roger. Len followed Roger’s directions and exposed his ass. Roger’s spit began to lube Len’s man hole. Len moaned as Roger rubbed his fingers across the hole and then plunged a finger into him.
Len cried out, “Fuck me,” and Roger stuffed his dick into him. Len clenched his teeth. “Oh, man. Fuck, you’re huge.”
Roger wasn’t listening; he was focused on pounding. He grabbed Len’s cock and began to jerk it as he pumped into Len.
“Fuck, Roger, I’m going to cum. Fuck, man, you’re gonna rip my dick off. Shiiiit.” Len spurted his load into the air.
An excited Roger came inside Len, and when he pulled out, cum spit out of Len’s ass.
Roger smacked Len on the chest. “That was a great fuck.”
“You’re a machine,” Len laughed. “How about we have something to eat, and we can fuck again at my place?”
“One fuck to a customer.” Roger buckled himself back up. “You’ve got some cum on your shirt, Officer Terrell. You might want to check that before you leave.”
It didn’t take long for Roger to be out in the light of day and walking back to where he’d parked the car. ‘What did that asshole think?’ thought Roger, ‘that I wanted to move in with him after one poke? I wanted to fuck a cop, so I did. Time for bigger things.’
On his way home, Roger stopped at a supermarket to pick up some things for dinner. While grabbing some milk, he noticed an older man choosing cheese who kept looking at him. He smiled back; the man seemed a little hesitant. Roger walked over to him. “Are you looking?”
“Pardon me?”
“Are you looking for some fun?” Roger said it a little more slowly.
The man turned red and pushed his cart away. Roger felt a hand on his shoulder.
“I’m looking.”
Turning, Roger saw Chris. “I’m disappointed that you asked someone else when you could have called me.”
Roger smiled. “Help me finish shopping, and then we’ll have some fun.”
“You going to let me fuck you this time?” asked Chris.
Roger wondered whether Jeff’s friend might be a regular buddy, and if so, would he ever realize that Roger was not Jeff.
In the darkness of the room, the man broke the silence. “Sister, I have become so weak.”
A quiet voice replied, “I know. Jeff is in a deep sleep. The more powerful Roger has become, the deeper his sleep.”
“Is Jeffie dead, sister?”
“No, but he has no purpose except to save memories no one wants to visit. He may sleep forever.”
“Oh, sister, I wish we could get Roger back. Jeff would have had Dr. Sanches put us together so we could all get out.”
“I know. Our time is not now. Maybe it will never be our time. But go to sleep now, I will keep watch.”
