Public Exposure: Here Come the Sun (And Dick)

Posted 1 Jun 2017

Even the guy in the subway is on his way somewhere bright and sunny. Like the fancy rooftop deck at the jailhouse. Where other prisoners will be scandalized but they'll get over it.

As for the rest of the folks, take a bright day and remove most if not all your clothes, and you have their secret to life.

I do question running a race mostly naked. It's important to have some testicular support. And I don't mean emotional. Although emotional testicular support would be quite appreciated by many.

"How does your sack feel today? Optimistic? Confused? Litigious?"

Implied in many of these is an off camera friend. Just like a drag queen can benefit from a buddy to carry some of their stuff (you don't want to leave your purse unattended in the dressing room), exhibitionists can be helped by an assistant.

I think I'll apply for a job as a Nudity Assistant. My qualifications include being totally in favor of nudity in most situations and tap dancing.

Though I draw the line at being barefoot in the subway station. Please no.

Plus how does someone expect to make the style pages if they are in zero clothes? Because when you're going out naked, you want to make the best dressed list, even if just for your socks.